Pathological Jokes

ADS FROM WOMEN - What they really mean
40-ish... 48 Adventurer... Has had more partners than you ever will Athletic... Flat-chested Average looking... Ugly Beautiful... Pathological liar Contagious Smile... Bring your penicillin Educated... College dropout Emotionally Secure... Medicated Feminist... Fat; ball buster Free spirit... Substance user Friendship first... Trying to live down reputation as slut Fun... Annoying Gentle... Comatose Good Listener... Borderline Autistic New-Age... All body hair, all the time Old-fashioned... Lights out, missionary position only Open-minded... Desperate Outgoing... Loud Passionate... Loud Poet... Depressive Schzophrenic Professional... Real Witch Redhead... Shops the Clairol section Reubenesque... Grossly Fat Romantic... Looks better by candle light Voluptuous... Very Fat Weight proportional to height... Hugely Fat Wants Soulmate... One step away from stalking Widow... Nagged first husband to death Young at heart... Toothless crone
THE MALE more...

FIRST THE ADS FROM WOMEN
40-ish... 48 Adventurer... Has had more partners than you ever will Athletic... Flat-chested Average looking... Ugly Beautiful... Pathological liar Contagious Smile... Bring your penicillin Educated... College dropout Emotionally Secure... Medicated Feminist... Fat; ball buster Free spirit... Substance user Friendship first... Trying to live down reputation as slut Fun... Annoying Gentle... Comatose Good Listener... Borderline Autistic New-Age... All body hair, all the time Old-fashioned... Lights out, missionary position only Open-minded... Desperate Outgoing... Loud Passionate... Loud Poet... Depressive Schzophrenic Professional... Real Witch Redhead... Shops the Clairol section Reubenesque... Grossly Fat Romantic... Looks better by candle light Voluptuous... Very Fat Weight proportional to height... Hugely Fat Wants Soulmate... One step away from stalking Widow... Nagged first husband to death Young at heart... Toothless crone
THE MALE SIDE OF THE more...

Subject: Truth in Advertising

List of Abbreviations in the WOMEN SEEKING MEN Classifieds
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CODE WORD INTERPRETED AS:

40-ish 48
Adventurer Has had more partners than you ever will
Affectionate Possessive
Artist Unreliable
Athletic Flat chested
Average looking Ugly
Beautiful Pathological liar
Commitment-minded Pick out curtains, now!
Communication important Just try to get a word in edgewise
Contagious Smile Bring your penicillin
Educated College dropout
Emotionally Secure Medicated
Employed Has part-time job stuffing envelopes at home
Enjoys art and opera Snob
Enjoys Nature Bring your own granola
Exotic Beauty Would frighten a Martian
Feminist Fat; ball buster
Financially Secure One paycheck from the street
Free spirit Substance user
Friendship first Trying to live down reputation as more...