Pickup Jokes / Recent Jokes

Pamela, the church gossip and self-appointed supervisor of the church's morals, kept sticking her nose into other people's business. Several residents were unappreciative of her activities, but feared her enough to maintain their silence.
She made a mistake, however, when she accused Tony, a new member, of being an alcoholic after she saw his pickup truck parked in front of the town's only bar one afternoon.
She commented to Tony and others that everyone seeing it there would know that he was an alcoholic.
Tony, a man of few words, stared at her for a moment and just walked away. He said nothing.
Later that evening, Tony quietly parked his pickup in front of Pamela's house... and he left it there all night!

The make, model, and license plate number of your truck are obscured by a layer of mud.You have got more bumper stickers than children.Your wife has ever taken two pairs of shoes to a funeral: one pair to trudge thru the wet Georgia red clay between the house and the pickup, and the other pair to wear at the funeral.You have ever had to stop at a car wash on the way to a funeral to wash the dump dirt from the back of your pickup so you can use it as a flower truck.Your clawfoot bathtub has ever been unusable because your wife was using it as a brooder.Your clawfoot bathtub sometimes serves as a hospital for injured fowl.You have ever come home and heard a ruckus in the bathroom. When you looked in, one of the injured fowl had escaped, found the chicken in the mirror, and was currently fighting with said chicken. There have ever been any gun parts, magazines, or ammunition stored on the window ledge of your kitchen - particularly if they have if they have laid there long enough for the more...

You think the blood on the front of your pickup truck looks cool.You think the blood on the back of your pickup truck looks cool.Your pickup truck no longer has a back.The worst day of your life was when you dropped your bottle of Jack Daniels the other day.The best day of your life was when you found an unopened bottle of Jack Daniels "over yonder in them hills."Your mustache is longer than your wife's hair.Cruise control in your truck involves fishing line, a pulley and a hook.Your gear shift lever is a pair of vise grips.

Do you have a picture of yourself? So I can show Santa what I want for Christmas!

Guy: Haven`t I seen you someplace before?
Girl: Yes, that`s why I don`t go there anymore.

There was a red head and a brunette sitting in the front of a pickup and two blondes in the back. Well something went wrong and they crashed into a lake. About 2 seconds later, the red head and brunette come up. Then about a minute later the blondes come up. The red head and brunette ask them what had taken them so long. They reply,"We had trouble getting the tailgate down."

You've ever strained your tea through a flyswatter.Your mother is hairier than your father.Instead of flossing you use a plunger.You take the back window out of your pickup because it's easier to chuck the empty beer cans in the back that way.When the back fills up with empty beer cans, you get another pickup and start all over again.Your grandma can bench press a ruck axle.You watch "The Dukes Of Hazzard" and have to find someone to explain it to you.Your mom kisses you goodnight and you go to school the next day and say you've met your future wife.