Plumber Jokes / Recent Jokes
Joe the Plumber? Since the economy is in the toilet, I believe McCain was insinuating that this guy will be his Secretary of Treasury.
A young Jewish couple had only recently set up housekeeping when an unfortunate incident occurred.
Early one morning, the wife, drowsy from bed, went to the toilet for the morning's relief, and neglected to notice that the seat was up. When she sat, she kept going! She was just the right size and shape so that she became jammed into the toilet past her waist with her legs sticking straight up in front of her.
She cried for her husband, who rushed in, and for the next hour tried desperately to extricate her. In this process they removed her sleeping gown, but this only left her naked and still stuck, with a particular part of her anatomy prominently visible between her splayed legs.
Finally, the couple resolved to call a plumber, despite the embarrassing nature of their problem.
When the plumber arrived, the young man let him in, but as they were walking to the bathroom, the young man realized that his wife was exposed in a very compromising and humiliating more...
A young Jewish couple had only recently set up housekeeping when anunfortunate incident occurred. Early one morning, the wife, drowsy from bed, went to the toiletfor the morning's relief, and neglected to notice that the seat was up. When she sat, she kept going! She was just the right size and shape so that she became jammedinto the toilet past her waist with her legs sticking straight up infront of her. She cried for her husband, who rushed in, and for the next hour trieddesperately to extricate her. In this process they removed her sleeping gown, but this only left hernaked and still stuck, with a particular part of her anatomy prominentlyvisible between her splayed legs. Finally, the couple resolved to call a plumber, despite the embarrassing nature of their problem. When the plumber arrived, the young man let him in, but as they werewalking to the bathroom, the young man realized that his wife wasexposed in a very compromising and humiliating way. Thinking fast, he ran ahead of more...
I feel bad about the way Joe the Plumber has been treated by the media. I haven’t seen a pile on like that since the last Jenna Jameson movie.
The following signs, spotted at various locations, say it all:
Sign over a gynecologist's office:
Dr. Jones, at your cervix.
At a military hospital - door to endoscopy:
To expedite your visit, please back in.
On a Plumber's truck:
We repair what your husband fixed.
On the trucks of a local plumbing company:
Don't sleep with a drip. Call your plumber.
Pizza shop slogan:
7 days without pizza makes one weak.
Another Pizza shop slogan:
Buy our pizza. We knead the dough.
At a tire shop in Milwaukee:
Invite us to your next blowout.
Door of a plastic surgeon's office:
Hello. Can we help pick your nose?
At a towing company:
We don't charge an arm and a leg. We want tows.
On an electrician's truck:
Let us remove your shorts.
On a maternity room door:
Push. Push. Push.
At an optometrist's office:
If you don't see what you're looking for, you've come to the right place.
On a taxidermist's more...
A lady was expecting the plumber; he was supposed to come at ten o’clock. Ten o’clock came and went; no plumber; eleven o’clock, twelve o’clock, one o’clock; no plumber. She concluded he wasn’t coming, and went out to do some errands. While she was out, the plumber arrived. He knocked on the door; the lady’s parrot, who was at home in a cage by the door, said, “Who is it? ”He replied, “It’s the plumber. ”He thought it was the lady who’d said, “Who is it? ” and waited for her to come and let him in.
When this didn’t happen he knocked again, and again the parrot said, “Who is it? ”He said, “It’s the plumber! ”He waited, and again the lady didn’t come to let him in. He knocked again, and again the parrot said, “Who is it? ”He said, “It’s the plumber!!!!!!!! ”Again he waited; again she didn’t come; again he knocked; again the parrot said, “Who is it? ”; “Aarrrrrrgggggghhhhhhh!!! ” he said, flying into a rage; he pushed more...
A lady was expecting the plumber; he was supposed to come at ten o'clock. Ten o'clock came and went; no plumber; eleven o'clock, twelve o'clock, one o'clock; no plumber.
She concluded he wasn't coming, and went out to do some errands. While she was out, the plumber arrived.
He knocked on the door; the lady's parrot, who was at home in a cage by the door, said, "Who is it?"
He replied, "It's the plumber."
He thought it was the lady who'd said, "Who is it?" and waited for her to come and let him in. When this didn't happen he knocked again, and again the parrot said, "Who is it?"
He said, "It's the plumber!"
He waited, and again the lady didn't come to let him in. He knocked again, and again the parrot said, "Who is it?"
He said, "It's the plumber!!!!!!!!"
Again he waited; again she didn't come; again he knocked; again the parrot more...