Polak Jokes / Recent Jokes

A 12-year-old boy comes up to the Polak and says, "I was looking in your bedroom window last night and I saw your wife giving you a blow job. Nyah, nyah, nyah." The Polak answers, "The joke's on you, Johnny. Nyah, nyah, nyah--I wasn't even home last night!"

Q: What do you get when you cross a 1-legged Polak with a Mongoloid?
A: A Polaroid One-Step.

Q: What do you get when you cross a 1-legged Polak with a Mongoloid? A: A Polaroid One-Step.

There are three construction workers on top of a building having lunch. One Italian, one Polak, and one Oriental. The Italian has a meatball hero, the Oriental has noodles, and the Polak has knockwurst. The Italian and the Oriental are tired of having the same lunches everyday. The Italian says that if he gets a meatball hero the next day that he will throw it off the building. The Oriental says that if he gets noodles tommorow he will also throw it off the building. The Polak says that if he gets knockwurst tommorow he will throw it off the building. Sure enough the Italian and Oriental workers open their lunch-boxes and they find that they have a meatball hero and noodles respectively. They both throw their lunches off the building. The Polak then throws his sandwich off the building. The other guys ask him how he knew that it was knockwurst again without even looking. He responded by saying, "Because I pack my own lunch."

This ethnically disadvantaged male person goes into the travel agency and proclaims, "I've seen your ad about a $99. 00 trip to Hawaii, and I'd like to go."
The travel agent says, "Listen, friend, this is my first day here, but I know about all the details of that crumby $99. 00 offer, and believe me, you DON'T want it. Take the next best offer, which is only $1, 399. 00."
"Oh, no you don't," says the Polak, "you're not going to catch ME with that bait and switch. The ad says `$99. 00 to Hawaii,' and THAT's what I want."
"Okay," says the agent, who takes a baseball bat from under the desk and hits the Polak in the head. The Polak wakes up a few hours later, on a raft out in the Pacific Ocean!
He looks around, and there's NOTHING, only he and another Polak on the raft.
"What are we going to do?" cries our hero, "surely they'll send a ship for us."
"I don't think so," responds more...

A Polak is hired to paint the lines on the road. On the first day he paints ten miles, and his employers are amazed. But, the second day he painted just five, and on only the third day, he painted only a mile of the road. Disappointed his boss asks what the problem was. The Polak replies, "Well sir, every day I have to walk farther and farther to get back to the paint bucket."

Q: You go to a cockfight. How do you know if a Polak is there? A: He's the one with a duck. Q: How do you know if an Italian is there? A: He bet on the duck. Q: How do you know if the Mafia is there? A: The duck wins.