Poland Jokes / Recent Jokes

A small two-seater Cessna 152 plane crashed into a cemetery early this afternoon in central Poland. Polish search and rescue workers have recovered 300 bodies so far and expect that number to climb as digging continues into the evening.

A blonde goes into a world wide message center to send a message to her mother in Poland.
When the man tells her it will be $300 She exclaims.."I don't have any money.. but I would do ANYTHING to get a message to my mother in Poland! !!!"
To that the man asks "Anything"65 And the blonde says "yes.. Anything"!!
With that, the man says "Follow me"..He walks into the next room and tells her "Come in and close the door"..She does!!
He then says "Get on your knees"..She does!!.. He then says take down my zipper"..She does!!... He then says "Go ahead... Take it out". With that, she takes it out and takes hold of it with both hands!! The man then says "Well.. Go ahead"!!...She brings her mouth closer to it, and while holding it close to her lips..She says "HELLO, MOM"6565

NEWS ITEM: Polish air disaster
Poland's Worst Air Disaster occurred today when a small two-seater Cessna 152
plane crashed into a cemetery early this afternoon in central Poland.
Polish search and rescue workers have recovered 326 bodies so far and expect
that number to climb as digging continues into the evening.

The five rules of Socialism:
1. Don't think
2. If you do think, don't speak
3. If you think and speak, don't write
4. If you think, speak and write, don't sign
5. If you think, speak, write and sign, don't be surprised
How does the Soviet Constitution differ from the American?
Under the Soviet Constitution citizens are guaranteed
freedom of speech, but under the United States constitution they are
guaranteed freedom after speech.
Why is Poland just like the United States?
In the United States you can't buy anything for zlotys and in
Poland you can't either, while in the U.S. you can get whatever you
want for dollars, just as you can in Poland.
Henry Cate III

The following began life as a Top Ten list of "Mistakes Made by Adolf Hitler."
it was passed around during a lecture in a political science class of mine and
soon grew to over 100 entries. I have culled out the stupid and/or truly
offensive ones, as well as any that said nasty things about any particular
nationality (read, the French.) You'll have to excuse the fact that some
of them are rather obscure, but that's what happens when you get a bunch of
political scientists in the same room. Without further ado, I give you...
Top 59 Mistakes Made by Adolf Hitler
Land War in Asia
Changed name from highly catchy "Schickelgruber" to boring "Hitler"
Leaving his little mustache: not growing a friendly Abe Lincoln
beard to instill trust among subjects
Not buying lifts for his shoes
Failure to exploit Me 262 Messerschmidt
Failure to exploit Eva Braun
Chose swastika as party symbol rather than the more...