Polish Jokes / Recent Jokes

Twenty-one reasons why English is hard to learn.

1. The bandage was wound around the wound.

2. The farm was used to produce produce.

3. The dump was so full it had to refuse more refuse.

4. We must polish the Polish furniture.

5. He could lead if he would get the lead out.

6. The soldier decided to desert his dessert in the desert.

7. Since there was no time like the present, he thought it was time to present the present.

8. A bass was painted on the head of the bass drum.

9. When shot at, the dove dove into the bushes.

10. I did not object to the object.

11. The insurance was invalid for the invalid.

12. There was a row among the oarsmen on how to row.

13. They were too close to the door to close it.

14. The buck does funny things when does are present.

15. A seamstress and a sewer fell down into a sewer more...

There was a British, a polish, and a Frenchman. They were in a plane that had crashed. They were all really hot as they walked across the desert. After a hour, they saw a magic lamp. They shook it up and saw a genie come out. The genie told them that they each got one wish.
They British wished for a fan to cool down. The Polish wished for a jug of water so he could drink it. The Frenchman wished for a car door, so when he got hot, he could pull down the window.

Did you hear about the Polish car insurance? It`s called "My Fault."

Banacek's Eighteenth Polish Proverb: The hippo has no sting, but the wise man would rather be sat upon by the bee.

The Americans and the Japanese decided to engage in a competitive boat race. Both teams practiced hard and long to reach their peak performance.
On the big day they felt ready. The Japanese won by a mile. Afterward, the American team was discouraged by the loss. Morale sagged. Corporate management decided that the reason for the crushing defeat had to be found, so a consulting firm was hired to investigate the problem and recommended corrective action.
The consultant`s finding: The Japanese team had eight people rowing and one person steering; the American team had one person rowing and eight people steering.
After a year of study and millions spent analyzing the problem, the consultant firm concluded that too many people were steering and not enough were rowing on the American team.
So as race day neared again the following year, the American team`s management structure was completely reorganized. The new structure: four steering managers, three area steering more...

Why did the Polak drive his kid to school every day? They were in the same class.

A guy goes into the store and says to the clerk, "I would like some Polish sausage."

The clerk looks at him and says, "Are you Polish?"

The guy says, "Well, yes I am. If I had asked for Italian sausage would you ask me if I was Italian? Or if I had asked for German sausage, would you ask me if I was German?" Or if I had asked for a taco would you ask if I was Mexican?"

The clerk says, "Well, no."

The guys says, "Then why do you ask me if I'm Polish just because I ask for Polish sausage?"

The clerk says, "Because this is a hardware store."