Politician Jokes / Recent Jokes

"Welcome to Heaven," St. Peter says to the newly arrived politician. "Before you settle in, you must spend one day in Hell and one in Heaven. Then you can choose where to spend eternity."
St. Peter escorts him to the elevator and he goes down to Hell. The doors open and he finds himself in the middle of a green golf course. In the distance is a club and all his friends and other politicians who had worked with him. Everyone is very happy and in evening dress.
They greet him, hug him, and reminisce about the good times they had getting rich at expense of the people. They play golf and dine on lobster and caviar. The devil is also there, a very friendly guy who laughs and tells jokes.
It is time to go. Everyone waves while the elevator rises. The elevator goes up and the door reopens on Heaven, where St. Peter is waiting for him. Now it's time to visit Heaven.
24 hours pass with the politician joining a group of contented souls moving from cloud more...

It was election time and a politician decided to go out to the local reservation and try to get the Native American vote. They were all assembled in the Council Hall to hear the speech. The politician had worked up to his finale, and the crowd was getting more and more excited. "I promise better education opportunities for Native Americans!"
The crowd went wild, shouting "Hoya! Hoya!"
The politician was a bit puzzled by the native word, but was encouraged by their enthusiasm. "I promise gambling reforms to allow a Casino on the Reservation!" "Hoya! Hoya!" cried the crowd, stomping their feet.
"I promise more social reforms and job opportunities for Native Americans!" The crowd reached a frenzied pitch shouting "Hoya! Hoya! Hoya!"
After the speech, the Politician was touring the Reservation, and saw a tremendous herd of cattle. Since he was raised on a ranch, and knew a bit about cattle, he asked the Chief if more...