Poof Jokes / Recent Jokes
A blonde, a brunette and a readhead are stuck on an island. For years and years they live there, until one day they find a magic lamp. They rub and rub and sure enough out comes a genie. The genie says "since I can only give out 3 wishes, you may each have one."
The brunette goes first, "I have been stuck here for years, I miss my family and my husband and my life-- I just want to go home". .. POOF she is gone.
The the red head makes her wish "This place sucks, I want to go home too". .. POOF she is gone.
The blonde starts crying uncontrollably. The genie says to her "My dear what is the matter, "I wish my friends were here". .. POOF!!!
Three guys, a Canadian, Osama bin Ladin and Uncle Sam are out walking together one day. They come across a lantern and a Genie pops out of it.
"I will give each of you each one wish, that's three wishes total," says the Genie.
The Canadian says, "I am a farmer, my dad was a farmer, and my son will also farm. I want the land to be forever fertile in Canada."
With a blink of the Genie's eye, 'POOF' the land in Canada was forever made fertile for farming.
Osama bin Ladin was amazed, so he said, "I want a wall around Afghanistan, so that no infidels, Jews or Americans can come into our precious state."
Again, with a blink of the Genie's eye, 'POOF' there was a huge wall around Afghanistan.
Uncle Sam (a former civil engineer) asks, "I'm very curious. Please tell me more about this wall."
The Genie explains, "Well, it's about 15,000 feet high, 500 feet thick and completely surrounds the country; nothing can get in or more...
Clinton, Suharto and Anwar were sent to Heaven for their crimes. They were, however given a second chance and sent back to earth.' Repeat any of your mistakes, and you will go to Hell immediately!' warned God. The trio then walked together back home. Along the way, Clinton spotted a pretty girl and whistled at her. With a' poof', he disappeared instantly, and was on his way to Hell. Then Suharto, who was walking in front of Anwar, saw a $50 dollar note on the ground, and bended down to pick it up. With a' poof', Anwar disappeared.
An old lady is rocking away the last of her days on her front porch, reflecting on her long life, when--all of a sudden--a fairy godmother appears in front of her and informs her that she will be granted three wishes.
"Well, now," says the old lady, "I guess I would like to be really rich."
*** POOF ***
Her rocking chair turns to solid gold.
"And, gee, I guess I wouldn't mind being a young, beautiful princess."
*** POOF ***
She turns into a beautiful young woman.
"Your third wish?" asked the fairy godmother.
Just then the old woman's cat wanders across the porch in front of them.
"Ooh--can you change him into a handsome prince?" she asks.
*** POOF ***
There before her stands a young man more handsome than anyone could possibly imagine. She stares at him, smitten. With a smile that makes her knees weak, he saunters across the porch and whispers in her ear: "Bet you're sorry you more...
A man was walking along the beach when he saw bottle. Curious, he picked it up and was wiping the sand off it when out came a genie. "I will grant you three wishes," said the genie.
The man couldn't believe it. "First, I want ten million dollars in a Swiss bank account."
Poof! The genie handed the man a piece of paper with his account information on it.
"Next, I want to be the smartest man in the world."
Poof! The man instantly became smart.
"Now, I want to be irresistible to women."
Poof! The man was changed into a huge box of chocolates.
There were 2 blondes and a brunette.
The first blonde said "I want to be smart." POOF! She was a brunette.
The other one said the same thing. POOF! She was a Brunette too!
The Brunette said "I want to be dumb!" POOF! She was a man!
Three guys, a Canadian, Osama Bin Laden and Uncle Sam are out walking together one day. They come across a lantern and a Genie pops out of it. "I will give each of you one wish, that's three wishes total," says the Genie. The Canadian says, "I am a farmer, my dad was a farmer, and my son will also farm. I want the land to be forever fertile in Canada." With a blink of the Genie's eye,' POOF' the land in Canada was forever made fertile for farming. Osama Bin Laden was amazed, so he said, "I want a wall around Afghanistan, so that no Americans can come into our precious state." Again, with a blink of the Genie's eye,' POOF' there was a huge wall around Afghanistan. "Uncle Sam" (a former civil engineer), asks, "I'm very curious. Please tell me more about this wall." The Genie explains, "Well, it's about 15, 000 feet high, 500 feet thick and completely surrounds the country; nothing can get in or out -- virtually impenetrable." more...