Population Jokes / Recent Jokes
Did you know that over 20% of the Chinese population have cataracts?
The other 80% drive Rincolns.
These questions about Australia were posted on an Australian Tourism Website and obviously the answers came from a fellow Aussie.
1. Q: Does it ever get windy in Australia? I have never seen it rain on TV, so how do the plants grow? (UK)
A: We import all plants fully grown and then just sit around watching them die.
2. Q: Will I be able to see kangaroos in the street? (USA)
A: Depends how much you've been drinking
3. Q: I want to walk from Perth to Sydney - can I follow the railroad tracks? (Sweden)
A: Sure, it's only three thousand miles, take lots of water...
4. Q: Is it safe to run around in the bushes in Australia? (Sweden)
A: So its true what they say about Swedes.
5. Q: It is imperative that I find the names and addresses of places to contact for a stuffed porpoise. (Italy)
A: Let's not touch this one.
6. Q: Are there any ATMs (cash machines) in Australia? Can you send me a list of them in Brisbane, Cairns, Townsville and Hervey Bay? more...
A village headman once noticed a sudden rise in the population of his village. To control it, he requested one of his rich relatives (who was an ardent swadeshi follower) to set up a condom factory near the village. It was done and very soon each unmarried adult male individual started getting condoms for free. But after two years the village headman was shocked to find that his village's population had doubled! After investigations the headman went straight to the relative and gave him a good dressing down saying 'Fool! Everything shouldn't be made of KHADI!'
Did you know that over 20% of the Chinese population have cataracts?
The other 80% drive Rincolns.
Controlling the Coyotes:
A few years ago, Sierra Club and USFS were presenting an alternative to Wyoming ranchers for controlling the coyote population. It seemed that, after years of the ranchers using the tried and true methods of shooting and/or trapping the predators, the tree-huggers had a "more humane" solution.
What they proposed was for the animals to be captured alive, the males castrated, then let loose again... and the population
would be controlled.
I kid you not, this was ACTUALLY proposed to the Wyoming Wool and Sheep Grower's association by Sierra Club and USFS.
Well, all the ranchers thought about this amazing idea for a couple
of minutes. Finally, an old boy
in the back stood up, kicked his hat back and said, "Son, I don't think you understand the problem. These coyotes ain't f----- our sheep, they're eating them!!"