Pray Jokes / Recent Jokes

Johnny, a very bright 5 year old, told his daddy he'd like to have a baby brother and, along with his request, offered to do whatever he could to help. His dad, a very bright 35 year old, paused for a moment and then replied, " I'll tell you what, Johnny, if you pray every day for two months for a baby brother, I guarantee that God will give you one!" Johnny responded eagerly to his dad's challenge and went to his bedroom early that night to start praying for a baby brother. He prayed every night for a whole month, but after that time, he began to get skeptical. He checked around the neighborhood and found out that what he thought was going to happen, had never occurred in the history of the neighborhood. You just don't pray for two months and then, whammo- a new baby brother. So, Johnny quit praying. After another month, Johnny's mother went to the hospital. When she came back home, Johnny's parents called him into the bedroom. He cautiously walked into the room, not more...

As the storm raged, the captain realized his
ship was sinking fast. He called out,
"Anyone here know how to pray?"
One man stepped forward. "Aye, Captain, I
know how to pray."
"Good," said the captain, "you pray while
the rest of us put on our life jackets -
we're one short."

Police gaffe makes Muslims pray in wrong direction



A Dutch police station trying to help Muslim detainees face Mecca for their prayers painted arrows in cells pointing in the wrong direction...Muslims pray five times a day, facing east in the direction of Mecca. But the arrows in Segbroek pointed west.

"This is a really gigantic, stupid blunder," a police spokesman told the De Telegraaf. "The faulty compass marks have been immediately corrected. It is a mystery for us how this could have possibly happened".

I think Theo Van Gogh was just having some fun.

Regardless, what does it matter if they're facing eastward or westward? As long as they pray downwards, they're facing their paradise.

Two young boys were spending the night at their grandparents. At bedtime, the two boys knelt beside their beds to say their prayers when the youngest one began praying at the top of his lungs.
"I PRAY FOR A NEW BICYCLE...
I PRAY FOR A NEW BICYCLE...
I PRAY FOR A NEW BICYCLE..."
His older brother leaned over and nudged the younger brother and said, "Why are you shouting your prayers? God isn't deaf." To which the little brother replied, "No, but Gramma is!"

There once was a rich man who was near death. He was very grieved because he had worked so hard for his money and he wanted to be able to take it with him to heaven. So he began to pray that he might be able to take some of his wealth with him. An angel hears his plea and appears to him. “Sorry, but you can’t take your wealth with you. ” The man implores the angel to speak to God to see if He might bend the rules. The man continues to pray that his wealth could follow him. The angel reappears and informs the man that God has decided to allow him to take one suitcase with him. Overjoyed, the man gathers his largest suitcase and fills it with pure gold bars and places it beside his bed. Soon afterward the man dies and shows up at the Gates of Heaven to greet St. Peter. St. Peter seeing the suitcase says, “Hold on, you can’t bring that in here! ” But, the man explains to St. Peter that he has permission and asks him to verify his story with the Lord. Sure enough, St. Peter more...

One summer, a drought threatened the crop in a small town. On a hot and dry Sunday, the village parson told his congregation, "There isn't anything that will save us except to pray for rain. Go home, pray, believe, and come back next Sunday ready to thank God for sending rain."
The people did as they were told and returned to church the following Sunday. But as soon as the parson saw them, he was furious.
"We can't worship today. You do not yet believe," he said.
"But," they protested, "we prayed, and we do believe."
"Believe?" he responded. "Then where are your umbrellas?"

Two young boys were spending the night at their grandparents' home. At bedtime, they were kneeling beside their beds to say their prayers when the youngest boy began to pray at the top of his lungs, "I PRAY FOR A NEW BIKE. I PRAY FOR A NEW GAMEBOY ADVANCE. I PRAY FOR A NEW DVD PLAYER... "
His older brother nudged him and asked, "Why are you shouting your prayers? God isn't deaf, you know."
"I know," replied his little brother, "but grandma is!"