Price Jokes / Recent Jokes

If only one price can be obtained for a quotation, the price will be unreasonable.

A woman went to a discount store to purchase several items. When she finally got to the checker, she learned one of her items had no price.She thought she'd die of embarrassment when the checker got on the intercom and boomed out for all the store to hear, "Price check on lane thirteen. Tampax. Supersize." As if that wasn't bad enough, the person looking for the price misunderstood the word "Tampax" for "Thumbtacks."In a businesslike tone, a voice boomed back over the intercom, "Do you want the kind you push in with your thumb or the kind you pound in with a hammer?"

A new young blonde bride calls her mother in tears. She sobs, "Robert doesn't appreciate what I do for him." "Now, now," her mother comforted, "I am sure it was all just a misunderstanding." "No, mother," you don't understand. "I bought a frozen turkey roll and he yelled and screamed at me about the price!" "Well, the nerve of that lousy cheapskate!" says her mom. "Those turkey rolls are only a few dollars." "No, mother it wasn't the price of the turkey, it was the airplane ticket." "Airplane ticket.... What did you need an airplane ticket for?" "Well mother, when I went to fix it, I looked at the directions on the package and it said -' Prepare from a frozen state,' so I flew to Alaska!"

He entered in one of the Watch Shops in Manhattan and went one round all through the shop.
One of the Salesmen invited him and asked him about his requirements. He wanted one Gents Wrist Watch. The Salesman showed him one of the best choice in his shop.
Pyara was impressed by the piece and asked the price of the watch. The salesmen tole him it is $100/-. Hearing the price he recollected one of his friend`s piece of advice that in Manhattan all items are doubly charged. Taking into consideration of his friend`s advice he started negotiating.
He told the Salesman if it is for $50/- he is interested. The Salesman did not want to lose the business. He came down with the price $80/-
Again Pyara wanted the Watch for $40/-. Then the salesman told "no no I will charge you $50/- last price".
Again Pyara wanted the watch for $25/-. Hearing this the Salesmen got annoyed and told Pyara he is giving the Watch Free Of Cost.
Pyara was happy and asked the more...

Santa Singh came to New Delhi and wanted to do shopping at Janpath. His delhiite friend told him that the prices are usually hiked up and he should bargain for half the price.
Santa Singh went and asked the price of stereo for which the vendor told 2000 Rs.
Santa Singh asked for Rs.1000.vendor told he can give the stereo for Rs.1800 for which Santa Singh told no, no only Rs.900.
Vendor said "ok, i will give it for 1500 Rs" and our Santa Singh bargained for Rs.750.
It was going on like this when finally vendor out of irritation and thinking that this stupid Sardar is not going to buy anything. He is just wasting my time. He said he will give the stereo for free.
Santa asked whether he will give two.
Vendor now realising that the sardar is out to have some fun and really not interested in buying anything. Vendor agreed.
Santa said now he wants to have the whole shop.

A woman walked into a Lexus dealership to browse, and spotted the most beautiful, perfect "loaded" Lexus. She walked over to inspect it more closely.

As she bent forward to feel the fine leather upholstery, an unexpected little burst of flatulence escaped her. Very embarrassed, she anxiously looked around to see if anyone had noticed. There, standing right behind her, was a salesman.

With a pleasant smile he greeted her, "Good day, Madame. How may we help you today?" Trying to maintain an air of sophistication and acting as though nothing had happened, she smiled back and asked, "Sir, what is the price of this lovely vehicle?"

Still smiling pleasantly, he replied, "Madame, I'm very sorry to say that if you farted just touching it, you're gonna shit when you hear the price.."

Several men are in the locker room of a private club after exercising. Suddenly a cell phone on one of the benches rings. A man picks it up and the following conversation ensues: "Hello?" "Honey, It's me." "Sugar!" "Are you at the club?" "Yes." "Great! I'm at the mall 2 blocks from where you are. I saw a beautiful mink coat. It is absolutely gorgeous! Can I buy it?" "What's the price?" "Only $1, 500." "Well, okay, go ahead and get it, if you like it that much." "Ahhh, and I also stopped by the Mercedes dealership and saw the 2002 models. I saw one I really liked. I spoke with the salesman and he gave me a really good price. .. and since we need to exchange the BMW that we bought last year..." "What price did he quote you?" "Only $60, 000!" "Okay, but for that price I want it with all the options." "Great! Before we hang up, something else..." more...