Prince Jokes

In Year 1981
1. Prince Charles got married
2. Liverpool crowned Champions of Europe
3. Australia lost the Ashes
4. Pope Died
In Year 2005
1. Prince Charles got married (again)
2. Liverpool crowned Champions of Europe(again)
3. Australia lost the Ashes (again)
4. Pope Died (again)
Moral of the story -
In future, if Prince Charles decides to re-marry....
Please warn the Pope

One dark night in hell, the Devil, bent upon his ultimate revenge, determined to become a computer programmer.
Secretly he pored over main pages, Microsoft press releases, and hex dumps of the renowned SATAN program, until, satisfied that he was master of the unclean craft, he began to work his mischief.
Lounging near the back gate to heaven, he remarked to Jesus that there were some things the Devil could do better than God. Perl programming, for instance.
The Savior, knowing something was afoot, but unwilling to let the slight go unchallenged, suggested a programming contest to last from sunrise to sunset, to see who could solve the halting problem in the fewest lines of Perl code, with God Almighty as the judge.
Sparks flew from the keyboard, and a sublime glow emanated from the monitor of the Prince of Darkness and the Prince of Peace, respectively, until five minutes before sunset, when a bolt of lightning flashed and the computers went dead.
A few minutes more...

This recently discovered folio edition of "Hamlet" follows other known
versions closely until Act V, Scene II, where it begins to diverge at
line 232, as will be seen:
KING...'Now the king drinks to Hamlet.' Come, begin,
And you the judges, bear a wary eye
Trumpets sound. HAMLET and LAERTES take their stations
HAMLET: Come on, sir.
LAERTES: Come, my lord.
Enter FRED, DAPHNE, VELMA, SHAGGY, AND SCOOBY
DAPHNE: Wait!
SHAGGY: Stop the fight!
HAMLET and LAERTES put up their foils
KING: I like this not. Say wherefore you do speak?
FRED: Good lord, I pray thee, let thy anger wait.
For we, in seeking clues, have found the truth
Behind the strange events of latter days.
VELMA: The first clue came from Elsinore's high walls,
Where, so said Hamlet, Hamlet's ghost did walk.
Yet though the elder Hamlet met his death,
And perforce hath been buried in the ground,
'Tis yet true one would not expect a more...

Q: What is the difference between a plate and a booger?
A: The plate is on the table, but the booger is under the table.
Q: What is the difference between a prince and a booger?
A: The prince is the heir to the throne, but the booger is thrown to the air.

Once upon a time in a faraway land, a prince had a spell put on him by an evil witch. He could only say one word each year. One day, he fell in love with a beautiful girl. He wanted to call her darling, so he waited a year. When that was up, he wanted to say "Darling, I love you." So he waited another three years. But then he decided to propose. So he waited another four years to say: "Will you marry me?" After 8 years, he sat her down in a lovely garden, and said: "Darling, I love you! Will you marry me?"

"Pardon?"