Queue Jokes / Recent Jokes

St. Peter has a day-off from his duties at the gates to Heaven and Jesus is standing in for him. Whilst 'booking-in' the new arrivals Jesus notices an old man in the queue who seems familiar. When this man gets to the front of the queue Jesus asks him his name."Joseph" is the reply, which makes Jesus more inquisitive."Occupation?" is the next question, the reply being "Carpenter".Jesus is now getting quite excited.In quite a state Jesus asks "Did you have a little boy?", the answer is "yes"."Did he have holes in his wrists and ankles?" asks Jesus, "Yes" comes the reply. Jesus looks at the old man in front of him and with a tear in his eye shouts "FATHER, FATHER"?! The old man looks puzzled and after a moment replies... "Pinnochio?"

8.00 AM, a line of 30 men are waiting till the spermbank opens that day.
One of the men sees there is a woman in the queue.
He asks her What do you want here?
She holds her hand on her mouth and says 'mmmmm mmm mmmmmmm mmm mmmmmmm!

A man was leaving a cafe with his morning coffee when he noticed a most unusual funeral procession A funeral coffin was followed by a second one about 50 feet behind the first. Behind the second coffin was a solitary man
walking with a black dog. Behind him was a queue of 200 men walking in single line. The man couldn`t stand his curiosity.
He approached the man walking with the dog, "I am so sorry for your loss, and I know now is a bad time to disturb you, but I`ve never seen a funeral like this with so many of you walking in single line. Whose funeral is it?"
The man replied, "Well, that first coffin is for my wife."
"What happened to her?"
The man replied, "My dog attacked and killed her."
He inquired further, "Well, who is in the second coffin? "
The man answered, "My mother-in-law. She was trying to help my wife when the dog attacked and killed her also."
A thoughtful moment of more...

A man was leaving a cafe with his morning coffee when he noticed a most unusual funeral procession approaching the nearby cemetery.

A Black hearse was followed by a second black hearse about 50 feet behind the first. Behind the second hearse was a solitary man walking a pit bull on a leash. Behind him was a queue of 200 men walking in single file.

The man couldn't stand the curiosity. He respectfully approached the man walking the dog, "I am so sorry for your loss, and I know now is a bad time to disturb you, but I've never seen a funeral like this with so many of you walking in single file. Whose funeral is it?"

The man replied, "Well, that first hearse is for my wife."

"What happened to her?"

The man replied, "My dog attacked and killed her."

He inquired further, "Well, who is in the second hearse?"

The man answered, "My mother-in-law. She was trying to more...

St. Peter has a day-off from his duties at the gates to Heaven and Jesus is standing in for him. Whilst' booking-in' the new arrivals Jesus notices an old man in the queue who seems familiar. When this man gets to the front of the queue Jesus asks him his name.

"Joseph" is the reply, which makes Jesus more inquisitive.

"Occupation?" is the next question, the reply being "Carpenter".
Jesus is now getting quite excited.

In quite a state Jesus asks "Did you have a little boy?", the answer is "yes".

"Did he have holes in his wrists and ankles?" asks Jesus, "Yes" comes the reply. Jesus looks at the old man in front of him and with a tear in his eye shouts "FATHER, FATHER"?!

The old man looks puzzled and after a moment replies.... "Pinnochio?"