Rebel Jokes

Being an Evil Overlord seems to be a good career choice. It pays well, there are all sorts of perks and you can set your own hours. However, every Evil Overlord I've read about in books or seen in movies invariably gets overthrown and destroyed in the end. I've noticed that no matter whether they are barbarian lords, deranged wizards, mad scientists or alien invaders, they always seem to make the same basic mistakes every single time. Therefore, if I ever happen to become an Evil Overlord...

1. My legions of terror will have helmets with clear Plexiglas visors, not face-concealing ones.

2. My ventilation ducts will be too small to crawl through.

3. My noble half-brother whose throne I usurped will be killed, not kept anonymously imprisoned in a forgotten cell of my dungeon.

4. Shooting is not too good for my enemies.

5. The artifact which is the source of my power will not be kept on the Mountain of Despair beyond the River of more...

What do you call someone who doesn't believe in Father Christmas?
A rebel without a Claus!

Mummies like Christmas^
Why do Mummies like Christmas so much?
Because of all the wrapping!

The difference between a rebel and a patriot is wether who is in power.

Greek police have surrounded a monastery in northern Greece after cutting off power, water and food supplies to about 100 rebel monks.

For months, authorities have been in a stand-off with the ultra-orthodox monks from Mount Athos, who have denounced moves by the Greek Orthodox Church to forge closer ties with the Roman Catholic Church.

Now under an eviction order to leave their centuries-old monastery, the fanatical priests have vowed to resist,
draping the building with signs which say "orthodoxy or death".

Greek authorities have ruled out force to evict the monks.