Recent Jokes / Recent Jokes
Regular, moderate exercise may help improve memory in older people a recent study shows. Unfortunately, another recent study shows that older people often forget to exercise.
Q: Why did the Saddam trade one of his thirteen wives for
a new toilet?
A: The hole was smaller and smelled better.
Q: What's the difference between Aeroflot and a Scud Missile?
A: Aeroflot has killed more people.
Q: What do you call two Iraqi women walking into a bar?
A: Incoming scuds!
Two Iraqis are chatting. One of them has his wallet out
and is flipping through pictures.
"This is my oldest. He's a martyr."
"Here's my second son. He's a martyr, too."
There's a pause. The second Iraqi says, wistfully, "Ah,
they blow up so fast, don't they?"
Top Least-Known Facts About Saddam Hussein
...Shares pain of economic embargo because he can only obtain
gold-plated replacement fixtures for solid gold bathtubs.
...Top scientists have finally unlocked technological secrets
of 8-track tapes and Pez dispensers, but have yet to procure
free HBO.
...Extensive private collection of Barbie dolls more...
With all the recent talk of cloning, you'd think it was a new thing. But in fact, a very wealthy westerner had himself cloned many years ago. The boy grew up to have very foul mouth. The more the son swore, themadder the father got. One day, the father got so mad he pushed his son off a high cliff. The sheriff arrested him for making an obscene clone fall.
Netscape employees found a gigantic blue stage prop in the shape of an' e' in front of their company's front door one recent morning.
The night before, the same 10-by-12-foot stage prop -- which represents the logo for Microsoft's Internet Explorer, or IE, -- was spotted at a Microsoft bash in San Francisco.
Netscape had the last laugh in the prank, though. Netscape employees placed a 12-foot foam likeness of their mascot' Mozilla' -- a green Godzilla-like creature on top of the' e'.
Mozilla held a placard that read:
Netscape -- 72
Microsoft - 18
referring to recent market share data.
On AppearanceExcessive use of perfume makes a woman less desirable. Perfumes are manufactured from fragrances of herbs, flowers, and other substances that are put into some medium that is strong enough to hold the odor. That medium is often ambergris...a secretion from the intestines of the sperm whale. In other words, you and your man may smell the odor of whale puke instead of enjoying the fragrance of flowers or herbs.Cleanliness is especially important. If a woman uses enough soap and has that clean, fresh look that a recent shower gives, she could wear a potato sack and still be desirable for her male.T-shirts are great. It doesn't take much male imagination to know that in less than five seconds, they are off over your head.Food particles between the teeth, especially the front teeth, are highly undesirable.On DatingIf you need to pass gas (fart), excuse yourself from his presence. Try not to destroy illusions by unpleasant odors. If you need to pass gas, face him..If you must more...
Partial list of suspects in recent foiled plot to blow up Continental, United and American Airlines aircraft in mid-flight:
Abdula Ahmed Ali
Shazad Khuram Ali
Nabeel Hussain
Umar Islam
Waseem Kayani
Assan Abdullah Khan
Waheed Arafat Khan
Shamin Mohammed Uddin
Waheed Zaman
Amin Asmin Tariq
Partial list of passengers randomly searched on a recent American Airlines flight out of General Edward L. Logan International Airport in Boston:
Mildred E. Sullivan
Brittany Amber Carlton
Keishi Matsamura
Hampton R. Hughes Jr.
Shari Elizabeth Cohen
Anthony Scatturcio
Sir Lesley Ian Woodward
Leanne Honeychurch
Father Thomas Mulhern
Edward L. Logan III