Reporter Jokes / Recent Jokes

A roving reporter from the BBC was touring a remote part of the
Scottish Highlands looking for material for a documentary about
the way of life there.
REPORTER: Hello there, excuse me, I'm from the BBC and I'm gathering
material for a documentary about the way of life in the
remote parts of the Scottish Highlands. You look like an
interesting fellow, perhaps I could interview you??
SCOTSMAN: Certainly...
REPORTER: Well, perhaps you could start by telling me your name?
SCOTSMAN: Well now there's a story. Y'know I deliver the mail round
here, but do they call me Donald the Postman? No they don't.
You see those fine crofts up on the hill there, well, I built
more than half of them myself, but do they call me Donald
the Croftbuilder? No, they don't.
And did you pass the nets down in the harbour? Well, I made
several of them, but do they call me Donald the Netmaker? No,
they don't.
But, I tell you, a moment's weakness with more...

A roving reporter from the BBC was touring a remote part of the
Scottish Highlands looking for material for a documentary about
the way of life there.
REPORTER:
Hello there, excuse me, I'm from the BBC and I'm gathering
material for a documentary about the way of life in the
remote parts of the Scottish Highlands. You look like an
interesting fellow, perhaps I could interview you?
SCOTSMAN:
Certainly...
REPORTER:
Well, perhaps you could start by telling me your name?
SCOTSMAN:
Well now there's a story. Y'know I deliver the mail round
here, but do they call me Donald the Postman? No they don't.
You see those fine crofts up on the hill there, well, I built
more than half of them myself, but do they call me Donald
the Croftbuilder? No, they don't.
And did you pass the nets down in the harbour? Well, I made
several of them, but do they call me Donald the Netmaker? No,
they don't.
But, I tell you, a more...

A roving reporter from the BBC was touring a remote part of theScottish Highlands looking for material for a documentary aboutthe way of life there.REPORTER: Hello there, excuse me, I'm from the BBC and I'm gathering material for a documentary about the way of life in the remote parts of the Scottish Highlands. You look like an interesting fellow, perhaps I could interview you? SCOTSMAN: Certainly... REPORTER: Well, perhaps you could start by telling me your name? SCOTSMAN: Well now there's a story. Y'know I deliver the mail round here, but do they call me Donald the Postman? No they don't. You see those fine crofts up on the hill there, well, I built more than half of them myself, but do they call me Donald the Croftbuilder? No, they don't. And did you pass the nets down in the harbour? Well, I made several of them, but do they call me Donald the Netmaker? No, they don't. But, I tell you, a moment's weakness with just ONE sheep....

A reporter heard Bush and one of his underlings talking in the hallway: "Mr President, how do we know for sure Iraq has weapons of mass destruction?" Pres says: "You think we're stupid boy??? We made copies of all the receipts!!"

A reporter cornered George W. Bush at a press conference: "Many say the only reason why you would be elected for President is due to the enormous power and influence of your father." "That notion is ridiculous!" mocked George Jr. "It doesn't matter how powerful the man is. He can only vote once!"

A cub reporter for a small town newspaper was sent out on his first assignment. He submitted the following report to his editor. "Mrs. Smith was injured in a car accident today. She is recovering in County Hospital with lacerations on her breasts."The Editor scolded the new reporter, "This is a family paper. We dont use words like breasts around here. Now go back and write something more appropiate!"The young reporter thought long and hard. Finally he handed the Editor the following report. "Mrs. Smith was injured in a car accident today. She is recovering in County Hospital with lacerations on her (. )(. ) "

THE SECRET TO OLD AGE

A woman celebrates her 90th birthday with a huge gala in the village. Everybody is there - the mayor, the police chief... and a reporter from the local newspaper.

The reporter asks, for the record, to what does she ascribe such a long life?

She tells about a great many things, including the 3 beers and 2 cigars she has each day.

Looking him level in they eye, she says evenly:' Never forget a healty and active sex life keeps your circulation going.'

The reporter is rather curious at such a declaration, and asks deferentially:' So when was the last time you made love, Mam? '

' Well, let me think - made love - the last time I did that was around 1945.'

' Whoah,' he says,' that's a helluva long time ago!'

' You think so? ' the woman replies and checks her watch.' But it's only 20:15 now, barely half an hour later.'