Ricky Jokes / Recent Jokes

The children in the Sunday school class were asked by their teacher to draw pictures of their favorite Bible stories. When she looked at little Ricky's picture, she was puzzled to see that he had drawn four people in an airplane, so she asked him which story it represented.
Little Ricky replied, "That's the Flight to Egypt."
"Oh, I see," said the teacher. "That must be Mary, Joseph and the Baby Jesus, but who's the fourth person?"
"That's Pontius... the Pilot!" answered Ricky.

Ricky Williams has put a book on his life story on hold. Problems arose when Williams kept rolling the manuscript.

A Marine stationed in Afghanistan recently received a "Dear John" Letter from his girlfriend back home.

It read as follows:

Dear Ricky,

I can no longer continue our relationship.
The distance between us is just too great. I must admit that I have cheated on you twice since you've been gone, and it's not fair to either of us.
I'm sorry.
Please return the picture of me that I sent to you.

Love,
Becky

The Marine, with hurt feelings, asked his fellow Marines for any snapshots they could spare of their girlfriends, sisters, ex-girlfriends, aunts, cousins etc.

In addition to the picture of Becky, Ricky included all the other pictures of the pretty gals he had collected from his buddies.
There were 57 photos in that envelope along with this note:

Dear Becky,
I'm so sorry, but I can't quite remember who the fuck you are.
Please take your picture from the pile, and send the more...

Did you hear the shocking announcement about singer Ricky Martin? He's a Republican!

Ricky ran into the kitchen sobbing and cradling something in his hands. "Mommy, my turtle's dead," he sobbed, as he held the turtle out to his mother.
His mother kissed him on the head and said, "That's all right. We'll wrap him in tissue paper and put him in a little box. Then we'll have a nice burial ceremony in the back yard. After that, we'll go out for an ice cream soda, then to the pet store to get you a new pet. I don't want you... " Her voice trailed off as she noticed the turtle move. "Ricky, your turtle isn't dead after all."
"Oh," the disappointed boy said. "Can I kill it?"

The following, said to be a true story as seen by millions of viewers on a Spanish T.V. Channel:

The parents of a teenage girl decided to put their daughter's name forward for a Surprise Game Show - she idolised Teen-Age Pop Star "Ricky Martin", and they arranged for TV cameras to be placed throughout the house.

The house was then left empty with Ricky Martin hidden in the wardrobe in the girls bedroom - all set to give the daughter a wonderful surprise. However, upon returning home from school and finding the house empty, the daughter made her way down to the kitchen where she opened the fridge and removed a tin of pate - at this stage the live TV audience is wondering "what the hell is going on?

She then went back upstairs to her bedroom where she proceeded to remove all her clothes and spread pate all over her triangle of womanhood (at this stage Ricky Martin is still hidden inside the wardrobe, and half of Spain is seeing a young more...

After the test match, new rules need to be incorporated by ICC to give the other teams a perfect clarification
(1) Ricky Ponting – (THE TRULY GENUINE CRICKETER OF THE CRICKET ERA AND WHOSE INTEGRITY SHOULD NOT BE DOUBTED ) should be considered as the FOURTH UMPIRE. As per the new rules, FOURTH UMPIRE decision is final and will over ride any decisions taken by any other umpires. ON-FIELD umpires can seek the assistance of RICKY PONTING even if he is not on the field. This rule is to be made, so that every team should understand the importance of the FOURTH UMPIRE.
(2) While AUSTRALIAN TEAM is bowling, If the ball flies anywhere close to the AUSTRALIAN FIELDER(WITHIN 5 metre distance), the batsman is to be considered OUT irrelevant of whether the catch was taken cleanly or grassed. Any decision for further clarification should be seeked from the FOURTH UMPIRE. This is made to ensure that the cricket is played with SPORTIVE SPIRIT by all the teams.
(3) While BATTING, more...