Riding Jokes / Recent Jokes
Two pandits riding on a cycle were stopped by a Sardarji constable."Don't you know riding on with pillon is forbidden in Punjab?" asked the constable, " I am going to fine you."
The pandits pleaded their innocence of the rules but he refused to let them go. Very exasperated the pandit who was driving the cycle replied, "All right, God is with us. Do what you like." " In that case, I'll fine you for having two on the pillion behind you".
Every day a 4th grade boy walks home from school past a 4th grade girls house. One day he is carrying a football, and he stops to taunt the little girl. He holds up the football and says "See this football? Football is a boys game and girls can't have one!" The little girl runs in the house crying and tells her mother about the encounter. She runs out and buys the girl a football. The next day the boy is riding home on his bike, and the girl shows him the football, yelling "Nah na nah na nah". The little boy gets mad and points to
his bike. "See this bike? This is a boys bike, and girls can't have them!" Next day, the boy comes by and the little girl is riding a new boys bike.
Now he is really mad. So he drops his pants, points at his most private of parts, and says "You see THIS? Only BOYS have these and your mother can't go buy you one!" The next day as he passes the house he asks the little girl "Well, what do you have to say more...
A man was riding a bike so fast at night time, without light
Police: why didnt u switch on ur light?
Man: there is light everywhere sir. (police takes out air from the tyre )
Man: why did u take out air in my tyre sir?
Police: there is air everywhere!
Little Red Riding Hood was walking through the woods on her way to visit her grandmother, when suddenly The Big Bad Wolf jumped out from behind a tree." Ah-ha....," The Big Bad Wolf said, "Now I've got you and I'm going toeat you! EAT! EAT! EAT!..."Little Red Riding Hood said angrily,"Damn it, doesn't anybody fuck anymore?"
One afternoon, a man was riding in the back of his limousine when he saw two men eating grass by the road side. He ordered his driver to stop and he got out to investigate. "Why are you eating grass?"he asked one man. "We don't have any money for food.", The poorman replied. "Oh, come along with me then." "But sir, I have a wife with two children!" "Bring them along! And you, come with us too!", he said to the other man. "But sir, I have a wife with six children!" the second man answered. "Bring them as well!" They all climbed into the car, which was no easy task, even for a car as large as the limo. Once underway, one of the poor fellows says "Sir, you are too kind. Thank you for taking all of us with you." The rich man replied "No, I appreciate you: the grass at my home is about three feet tall!"
Little red riding hood is walking through the woods when the big bad wolf jumps out and says "Im going to eat you little girl!" Eat, Eat, Eat she says! Doesnt anybody just fuck anymore?
Little Red Riding Hood was walking through the woods on her way to Grandma's house when the Big Bad Wolf suddenly jumped out from behind a tree.
Holding a knife to her throat, he sneered, "Aha, now I have you Red. I'm going to screw your brains out!"
Calmly, Little Red Riding Hood reached into her picnic basket, pulled out a pistol and pointed it at him.
"That's what you think!" she exclaimed. "You're going to eat me just like the book says!"