Rolls-royce Jokes / Recent Jokes

Before going to Europe on business, a man drove his Rolls Royce to a downtown NY City bank and went in to ask for an immediate loan of $5, 000. The loan officer was quite taken a back, and requested collateral. "Well, then, here are the keys to my Rolls-Royce", the man said. The loan officer promptly had the car driven into the banks underground parking for safekeeping, and gave him $5, 000. Two weeks later, the man walked through the banks doors, and asked to settle up his loan and get his car back. The loan officer checked the records and told him, "That will be $5, 000 in principal, and $15. 40 in interest." The man wrote out a check, thanked the loan officer, and started to walk away. "Wait sir," the loan officer said, "while you were gone, I found out you are a millionaire. Why in the world would you need to borrow? The man smiled. "Where else could I securely park my Rolls-Royce in Manhattan for two weeks and pay only $15. 40?"

Before going to Europe on business, a man drove his Rolls-Royce to a downtown NY City bank and went in to ask for an immediate loan of $5, 000. The loan officer, taken aback, requested collateral. "Well, then, here are the keys to my Rolls-Royce", the man said. The loan officer promptly had the car driven into the bank's underground parking for safe keeping, and gave him $5, 000. Two weeks later, the man walked through the bank's doors, and asked to settle up his loan and get his car back. "That will be $5, 000 in principal, and $20. 30 in Interest", the loan officer said. The man wrote out a check and started to walk away. "Wait sir", the loan officer said, "while you were gone, I found out you are a millionaire. Why in the world would you need to borrow $5, 000?" The man smiled. "Where else could I park my Rolls-Royce in Manhattan for two weeks and pay only $20. 30?

A guy driving a Yugo pulls up at a stoplight next to a Rolls-Royce. The driver of the Yugo rolls down
his window and shouts to the driver of the Rolls, "Hey, buddy, that's a nice car. You got a phone in
your Rolls? I've got one in my Yugo!"
The driver of Rolls looks over and says simply, "Yes I have a phone."
The driver of the Yugo says, "Cool! Hey, you got a fridge in there, too? I got a fridge in the back
seat of my Yugo!"
The driver of the Rolls, looking annoyed, says, "Yes, I have a refrigerator."
The driver of the Yugo says, "That's great, man! Hey, you got a TV in there, too? You know, I got a
TV in the back seat of my Yugo!"
The driver of the Rolls, looking very annoyed by now, says, "Of course I have a television. A
Rolls-Royce is the finest luxury car in the world!"
The driver of the Yugo says, "Very cool car! Hey, you got a bed in there, too? I got a bed in more...

Three men die and go to heaven. When they get to the pearly gates, St. Peter asks them each one question: "How many times have you cheated on your wife?"
The first one answers "Never!" St. Peter checks the books, discovers the man is correct and gives him a Rolls-Royce to drive during his stay in heaven.
The second man answers "Oh, about 25-30 times." He is given a Ford Pinto and sent on his way.
The third man answers "Maybe 400-500 times" and is assigned a bicycle. A few months later, the three meet up and the Pinto driver, and the bicycle rider notice the Rolls-Royce man has a long drawn-out sad look on his face. Puzzled, the other two query him as to "why the sad face?".
Mr. Rolls just looked at them and said, "I just saw my wife, she was on a skateboard!"

Before going to Europe on business, a lawyer drove his Rolls-Royce to a downtown NY City bank and went in to ask for an immediate loan of $5, 000.
The loan officer, taken aback, requested collateral. “Well, then, here are the keys to my Rolls-Royce”, the lawyer said.
The loan officer promptly had the car driven into the bank’s underground parking for safe keeping, and gave him $5, 000.
Two weeks later, the lawyer walked through the bank’s doors, and asked to settle up his loan and get his car back. “That will be $5, 000 in principal, and $20. 30 in Interest”, the loan officer said. The lawyer wrote out a check and started to walk away.
“Wait sir”, the loan officer said, “while you were gone, I found out you are a millionaire. Why in the world would you need to borrow $5, 000? ”
The lawyer smiled. “Where else could I park my Rolls-Royce in Manhattan for two weeks and pay only $20. 30?

A guy driving a Yugo pulls up at a stoplight next to a Rolls-Royce. The driver of the Yugo rolls down his window and shouts to the driver of the Rolls, "Hey, buddy, that's a nice car. You got a phone in your Rolls? I've got one in my Yugo!"The driver of Rolls looks over and says simply, "Yes I have a phone."The driver of the Yugo says, "Cool! Hey, you got a fridge in there too? I've got a fridge in the back seat of my Yugo!"The driver of the Rolls, looking annoyed, says, "Yes, I have a refrigerator."The driver of the Yugo says, "That's great, man! Hey, you got a TV in there, too? You know, I got a TV in the back seat of my Yugo!"The driver of the Rolls, looking very annoyed by now, says, "Of course I have a television. A Rolls-Royce is the finest luxury car in the world!"The driver of the Yugo says, "Very cool car! Hey, you got a bed in there, too? I got a bed in the back of my Yugo!"Upset that he did not have a more...