Roman Jokes / Recent Jokes
Why did the Roman Empire collapse? What is Latin for office automation?
Do Roman paramedics refer to IV's as "4's"?
Why is it that if someone tells you that there are 1 billion stars in the universe you will believe them, but if they tell you a wall has wet paint you will have to touch it to be sure?
If you take an Oriental person and spin him around several times, does he become disoriented?
If people from Poland are called "Poles," why aren't people from Holland called "Holes?"
Why did the Roman Empire collapse? What is the Latin for office automation?
How can you tell when an elephant has been in your refrigerator?
Footprints in the butter!
School collection 21^
Why did the pioneers cross the country in covered wagons?
Because they didn’t want to wait 40 years for a train!
Why did the teacher wear sunglasses?
Because his class was so bright!
1st Roman Soldier: What is the time?
2nd Roman Soldier: XX past VII!
Did you hear about the cross eyed teacher?
He couldn’t control his pupils!
Teacher: What family does the octopus belong to?
Pupil: Nobody I know!
Jesus, hanging on the cross, says, "Peter, come here." Peter, thinking he is about to receive a profound religious truth, moves towards Jesus but the Roman soldiers push him back.
Again Jesus summons, "Peter, come here." Peter tries again, but the Roman soldiers again push him away.
Jesus summons a third time, "Peter come here." Peter gathers all of his strength and finally breaks through. Bleeding from several lance wounds, Peter says, "Yes, Master?"
Jesus looks upon Peter and says, "I can see your house from here!"
The US Standard railroad gauge (distance between the rails) is 4 feet, 8. 5 inches. That's an exceedingly odd number. Why was that gauge used? Because that's the way they built them in England, and the US railroads were built by English expatriates. Why did the English people build them like that? Because the first rail lines were built by the same people who built the pre-railroad tramways, and that's the gauge they used. Why did "they" use that gauge then? Because the people who built the tramways used the same jigs and tools that they used for building wagons, which used that wheel spacing. Okay! Why did the wagons use that odd wheel spacing? Well, if they tried to use any other spacing the wagons would break on some of the old, long distance roads, because that's the spacing of the old wheel ruts. So who built these old rutted roads? The first long distance roads in Europe were built by Imperial Rome for the benefit of their legions. The roads have been used ever since. more...