Roommate Jokes / Recent Jokes

These are intended for entertainment purposes only. We do not advise that you ever do these things to a roommate or yourself.
26. Write your roommate's name in big print on hundreds of pages of paper. Leave pages all over the room. If he asks about it, say you didn't write it.

Hubby: You always carry my photo in your handbag to the office.Why?
Wife: When there is a problem, no matter how impossible, I look at your picture and the problem disappears.
Hubby: You see how miraculous and powerful I am for you?
Wife: Yes, I see your picture and say to myself, "What other problem can there be greater than this one?"
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Girl: When we get married, I want to share all your worries, troubles and lighten your burden.
Boy: It's very kind of you, darling, but I don't have any worries or troubles.
Girl: Well, that's because we aren't married yet!
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Son: Mom, when I was on the bus with Dad this morning, he told me to give up my seat to a lady.
Mom: Well, you have done the right thing.
Son: But mum, I was sitting on daddy's lap!
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Wife to husband: "What's your excuse for coming home at more...

These are intended for entertainment purposes only. We do not advise that you ever do these things to a roommate or yourself.
27. Hide a bunch of potato chips in the bottom of a trash can. When you get hungry, root around in the trash. Find the food, and eat it. If your roommate empties the trash before you get hungry, demand that s/he reimburse you.

These are intended for entertainment purposes only. We do not advise that you ever do these things to a roommate or yourself.
28. Leave a declaration of war on your roommate's desk. Include a list of grievances.

These are intended for entertainment purposes only. We do not advise that you ever do these things to a roommate or yourself.
29. Apoligze to your roommate. If he asks why, tell him that he should know better than you.

These are intended for entertainment purposes only. We do not advise that you ever do these things to a roommate or yourself.
3. Twitch a lot.

These are intended for entertainment purposes only. We do not advise that you ever do these things to a roommate or yourself.
30. Shoot rubber bands at your roommate while his/her back is turned, and then look away quickly.