Root Jokes / Recent Jokes

Recursion is the root of computation since it trades description for time.

(Linux is a server far superior to windows. It's logo is Tux the digital penguin.)
1. Your favorite movie was Kill Bill.
2. Your favorite animal is a penguin.
3. You think micro and soft describe Bill Gates.
4. You would like to "server" Gates head.
5. Your desktop picture is of tux burning the windows flag.
6. Your motto is "W1ND0W$ 1$ 7H3 root 0F @LL 3V1L"
7. You can read the above statment.
8. You think XBOX was Microsoft's first success.
9. You would rather have a computer from Hasbro than Microsoft.
10. Your computer can play solitaire.
For you Windows users #6 means "Windows is the root of all evil".

The things I've learnt from porn:
Women wear high heels to bed.
A blowjob will always get a woman out of a speeding fine.
Lesbians love it when a guy bursts in on them.
All women are bisexual or have fantasised about it.
No man is bisexual.
Women hitchhike in high heels and bikinis and will always offer you sex in exchange for a ride to who knows where.
If you come across a guy and his girlfriend having a root in the bushes, the boyfriend won't bash you if you join in without asking.
Job interviews often turn into orgies.
Nurses give patients blowjobs especially if they have multiple bandages or are in a coma. The patient always makes a miraculous recovery.
When a complete stranger asks a sunbathing woman to rub suntan lotion over her breasts she doesn't tell him to F#@% off.
She will insist he roots her.
Calling a woman a bitch won't get you thrown out of bed. It turns her on even more.
French maids and baby sitters are more...