Runway Jokes / Recent Jokes

Santa and Banta were sitting in a bar getting really drunk. After a while, just drinking gets boring, so Santa looks at the Banta and says, "Hey, you want to go up for a ride in my airplane?"
Banta says, "Wow, you have an airplane? Let's go!"
So they get some more beer and go for a tour around the city in the plane. Eventually they get bored with this too, so they decide to land. The drunk Santa starts circling around looking for a place to land, and he sees an airstrip close by.
Santa says, "Let's land here. It looks like it's as good a place as any."
So he circles around and goes in for a landing, but at the last minute he swerves and pulls back up
"Shit!" he says, "That is the SHORTEST runway I have ever seen! How is anyone supposed to land on it?"
But since it's the only runway nearby, he decides to try again, with the same result.
Getting pretty irritated, Santa says to Banta, "All right, I'm going more...

LH741:"Tower, give me a rough timecheck!"
Tower: "It's tuesday, Sir."

Tower: Have you got enough fuel or not?
Pilot: Yes.
Tower: Yes what??
Pilot: Yes, SIR!

Tower: Shamu Two Two, please state estimated time of arrival.
Pilot: Ok, let's see..., I think Tuesday would be nice...

Pilot: "Bratislava Tower, this is Oscar Oscar Kilo estabished ILS16."
Tower: "Oscar Oscar Kilo, Guten Tag, cleared to land 16, wind calm and by the way: this is Wien Tower."
Pilot: (short break) "Bratislava Tower, Oscar Oscar Kilo passed the outer marker."
Tower: "Oscar Oscar Kilo roger, and once more: you are approaching Vienna!"
Pilot: (short break again) "Confirm, this is NOT Bratislava?"
Tower: "You can believe me, this is Vienna!
Pilot: (once again short break) "But why? We want to go to Bratislava, not to Vienna!"
Tower: "Oscar more...