Saddam Jokes / Recent Jokes

Saddam Hussein and his chauffeur were rolling down the highway when suddenly they hit a pig crossing the road. They killed it instantly.

Saddam tells his driver: "Go to da farm over dere and hexplain to da honer of da pig what appened."

One hour later, Saddam sees his driver coming back from the farm, his clothes all wrinkled, a bottle of wine in one hand and a cigar in the other.

"What appen to you?" he asks.

"Well, the farmer gave me a bottle of wine, his wife, the cigar and their 19 year old daughter made wild passionate love to me."

"My God! What did you tell dem?" asked President Hussein.

The driver answered: "Good evening, I am Saddam Hussein's chauffeur and I have just killed the pig."

In lighter vein. ..
Saddam calls Bush on 11th sept:
Saddam: Mr President, I would like to express my
condolences to you. It is a real tragedy. So many people,
such great buildings... I would like to ensure that we had nothing in connection with that... It was not us...
Bush: What buildings? What people??

Saddam: Oh, and what time it is in America now?

Bush: It's eight in the morning.

Saddam: Oops... Will call back in an hour! Bye bye.

* * * * * *

The Prime Minister of China called President Bush to
console him:

"I'm sorry to hear about the attack. It is a very
big tragedy. But in case you are missing any documents from
the Pentagon, we have copies of everything."


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Two days after being sentenced to death for crimes against humanity, Saddam Hussein called on all Iraqis, Arabs and Kurds, to "forgive, reconcile and shake hands," adding that, "If Paris and Nicole can do it, so can we."

Saddam Hussein is sitting at home when the phone rings. He picks it up and says "Hello". The voice at the end of the phone says "Hello Mr. Hussein, it's Paddy here. I'm just ringing to let you know that we've declared war on your country." SH smiles to himself, "Come on Paddy", he says, "there's no point you declaring war on us, you wouldn't stand a chance." Paddy replies, "No, no, we've had ourselves a meeting, and we've decided to declare war on you." So SH says, "OK Paddy, now listen, I've got an air force of over a thousand planes, what kind of air force have you got to match that? It'd be over in no time." So Paddy says, "Well my lad's got himself a hot-air balloon, and my brother used to work at an airport." Hussein laughs, "Oh come on, you've not got a hope". "Hold on a sec, Mr. Hussein, ", Paddy says, "we'll just have a quick meeting." So off he goes and has a quick meeting. more...

Deposed Iraqi Dictator Saddam Hussein was hung last night.

His mysterious last words: "I'm no scar. Dot com."
Witnesses report the faint refrains of a ukelele playing in the wind.

Saddam Hussain Visits God And Asks Him: " God When Shall I See The Defeat Of George Bush? " God Replies:" Son, You Will Not
See It In Your Lifetime. " Hearing This, Saddam Hussain Starts Crying And Goes Away. Gen Parvez Musharaff Visits God And Asks
Him: " God When Shall I See The Capture Of Kashmir By Pakistan?" God Replies: " Son, You Will Not See It In Your Lifetime."
Hearing This, Gen Parvez Musharaff Starts Crying And Goes Away. Laaloo Yadav Visits God And Asks Him:" God When Shall I See
Bihar Becoming A Prosperous And Happy State? " Hearing This, God Starts Crying. Laaloo Is Astounded And Asks: " God, Why Are
You Crying? " God Replies: " Son, I Will Not See It In My Lifetime"

Q: What's the national bird of Iraq? A: DUCK! -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Q: What's the fastest way to break up a bingo game in Baghdad? A: You shout out, "B-52" -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- The latest from Saudi Arabia and Baghdad is that: Americans claim they have air superiority over Iraq. Iraqis claim they have air superiority over Iran. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Q: Why doesn't Saddam go out drinking? A: Why should he when he can get bombed at home? -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Q: What does Saddam Hussein have in common with Fred Flinstone? A: They both can look out of their window and see rubble! -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Q: Have you heard about the new Royal Iraqi Air Force exercise program? A: Each morning more...