Safe Jokes / Recent Jokes

Practice safe eating. Always use condiments.

A blonde and a brunitte were going to rob a bank and the blonde was told to go in and blow up the safe and tie up the guard. the blonde went in and never came out until 3 hours later wen she came out the safe was tied around her and the guard came out with his trousers down!

The key to safe sex is in the palm of your hand.

If flying is so safe, why do they call the airport the' terminal'?

What is a man's idea of safe sex?
A padded headboard.

Practice safe eating...Always use condiments.

Joe sat at his dying wife's bedside. Her voice was little more than a whisper.
"Joe, darling," she breathed, "I've a confession to make before I go.. .. I. .. I'm the one who took the $10, 000 from your safe.. .. I spent it on a fling with your best friend, Charles. And it was I who forced your mistress to leave the city. And I am the one who reported your income-tax evasion to the government.. . . "
"That's all right, dearest, don't give it a second thought," answered Joe. "I'm the one who poisoned you."