Scarlet Jokes / Recent Jokes

[The following, possibly apocryphal story appeared in the Glasgow Herald.]
Lord George Brown, when the band struck up at an embassy function, asked: "Beautiful lady in scarlet, will you waltz with me?"
"Certainly not," was the reply. "First, you are drunk. Second, it is not a waltz, but the Venezuelan national anthem; and third, I am not a beautiful lady in scarlet, but the papal nuncio."

[The following, possibly apocryphal story appeared in this morning's
(28/03/91) Glasgow Herald.]
Lord George Brown, when the band struck up at an embassy function,
asked: "Beautiful lady in scarlet, will you waltz with me?"
"Certainly not," was the reply. "First, you are drunk. Second, it
is not a waltz, but the Venezualan national anthem; and third, I am
not a beautiful lady in scarlet, but the papal nuncio."