Scout Jokes / Recent Jokes

A troop of Boy Scouts was being used as "Guinea pigs" in a test of emergency systems.
A mock earthquake was staged, and the Scouts impersonated wounded persons who were to be picked up and cared for by the emergency units.
One Scout was supposed to lie on the ground and await his rescuers, but the first-aid people got behind schedule, and the Scout lay "wounded" for several hours.
When the first-aid squad arrived where the casualty was supposed to be, they found nothing but this brief note: "Have bled to death and gone home."

A Girl Scout troop leader suddenly came upon a clearing where a young couple was engaged in oral sex.
"Back ladies, back!" cried the leader. "There's a very dangerous beast out there!"
But it was too late, as several of her girls had more-or-less seen the deed happening. They asked their leader what it was the couple was doing.
"Well, err... if you must know, uh, they were practicing a brand new form of artificial respiration... yeah, that's it, it's artificial respiration!"
"WOW!" exclaimed the oldest of the group. "I know which merit badge I'm gonna try for next!"

Dear Mom, Our scout master told us all write to our parents in case you saw the flood on TV and worried. We are OK. Only 1 of our tents and 2 sleeping bags got washed away. Luckily, none of us got drowned because we were all up on the mountain looking for Chad when it happened. Oh yes, please call Chad's mother and tell her he is OK. He can't write because of the cast. I got to ride in one of the search & rescue jeeps. It was neat. We never would have found him in the dark if it hadn't been for the lightning. Scoutmaster Webb got mad at Chad for going on a hike alone without telling anyone. Chad said he did tell him, but it was during the fire so he probably didn't hear him. Did you know that if you put gas on a fire, the gas can will blow up? The wet wood still didn't burn, but one of our tents did. Also some of our clothes. John is going to look weird until his hair grows back. We will be home on Saturday if Scoutmaster Webb gets the car fixed. It wasn't his fault about the wreck. more...

What do you call a man with 10 rabbits up his bum?
Warren.

What do you call two Canadian lesbians in a canoe?
Fur traders.

What do you call a lesbian from Alaska?
Klondike.

What do you call an exhausted bear?
Winnie the Pooped!

What do you call an independently wealthy woman in Texas?
A divorcee.

What do you call an intelligent man in the United States?
A tourist.

What do you call Bob the Mailman after he gets fired?
Bob.

What do you call boobs on a Girl Scout?
Brownie points.

What do you call Bob the Mailman after he gets fired?
Bob.

What do you call boobs on a Girl Scout?
Brownie points.

What do you call a prostitute who works in Chicago and New York? The tail of two cities.

What do you call an Irish homosexual?
Gay-lick.

What do you call an Italian with an IQ of 180?
Sicily.

What do more...