Shortage Jokes / Recent Jokes

A soldier was asked to report to the headquarters sergeant for an assignment.
The sergeant said, “We have a critical shortage of typists. I'll give you a
little test. Type this, ” he ordered, giving him a pamphlet to copy and a sheet of paper, and pointing to a desk across the room that held a typewriter and an adding machine.
The man, quite reluctant to become a clerk typist, made a point of typing very slowly, and saw to it that his work contained as many errors as possible.
The sergeant gave the typed copy only a brief glance. “That's fine, ”" he said. “Report for work at 8 tomorrow. ”
“But aren't you going to check the test? ” the prospective clerk asked.
The sergeant grinned. “You passed the test, ” he replied, “when you sat down at the typewriter instead of at the adding machine. ”

These four guys were walking down the street, a Saudi, a Russian, a North Korean, and a New Yorker. A reporter comes running up and says, "Excuse me, what is your opinion about the meat shortage?" The Saudi says, "What's a shortage?" The Russian says, "What's meat?" The North Korean says, "What's an opinion?" The New Yorker, says, "Excuse me?? What's excuse me?"

Resolving to surprise her husband, an executive’s wife stopped by his office. She found him with his secretary sitting in his lap. Without hesitating, he dictated, “…and in conclusion, gentlemen, shortage or no shortage, I cannot continue to operate this office with just one chair. ”

These four guys were walking down the street, a Saudi, a Russian, a North Korean, and a New Yorker. A reporter comes running up and says, "Excuse me, what is your opinion about the meat shortage?"The Saudi says, "Whats a shortage?"The Russian says, "Whats meat?"The North Korean says, "Whats an opinion?"The New Yorker, says, "Excuse me?? Whats excuse me?"

A pollster was taking opinions outside the United Nations building in New York City. He approached four men waiting to cross the street: a Saudi, a Russian, a North Korean and a resident New Yorker. He asked, "Excuse me, I would like to ask you your opinion on the current meat shortage?" The Saudi replied, "Excuse me, but what is a shortage?" The Russian said, "Excuse me, but what is meat?" The North Korean replied, "Excuse me, but what is an opinion?" The New Yorker replied, "What is' excuse me'?"

A Russian, a New Yorker, and a Texan were being interviewed by a TV news crew. The reporter asked, "Excuse me, what do you think about the meat shortage?" The Texan answered, "What shortage?" The Russian answered, "What's meat?" The New Yorker answered, "What's' excuse me'?"

Worldwide survey was conducted by the! UN. The only question asked was:
"Would you please give your honest opinion about solutions to the food shortage in the rest of the world?"
The survey was a huge failure, In Africa they didn't know what' food' meant, In India they didn't know what' honest' meant, In Europe they didn't know what' shortage' meant, In China they didn't know what' opinion' meant, In the Middle East they didn't know what' solution' meant, In South America they didn't know what' please' meant, And in the USA they didn't know what' the rest of the world' meant!