Shower Jokes / Recent Jokes
When is the water in the shower room musical? When its piping hot.
1. Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks. 2. Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. If you see your boyfriend/husband along the way, cover up any exposed flesh and rush to bathroom. 3. Look at your womanly physique in the mirror and stick out your gut so that you can complain and whine even more about how you're getting fat. 4. Get in the shower. Look for facecloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone. 5. Wash your hair once with cucumber and lamfrey shampoo with 83 added vitamins. 6. Wash your hair again with cucumber and aloe vera shampoo with 83 added vitamins. 7. Condition your hair with cucumber and aloe vera conditioner enhanced with natural crocus oil. Leave on hair for 15 minutes. 8. Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red raw. 9. Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash. 10. Rinse conditioner off hair (this takes at least 15 minutes more...
Why do priests wear shorts in the shower? They don't like to look down on the unemployed.
In case any of you are still thinking about picking a vacation spot, be aware of the following advertising lingo...
Old world charm. ......... No bath
Tropical. ................ Rainy
Majestic setting. ........ A long way from town
Options galore. .......... Nothing is included in the itinerary
Secluded hideaway. ....... Impossible to find or get to
Pre-registered rooms. .... Already occupied
Explore on your own. ..... Pay for it yourself
No extra fees. ........... No extras
Nominal fee. ............. Outrageous charge
Standard.................. Sub-standard
Deluxe. .................. Standard
Superior. ................ One free shower cap
All the amenities. ....... Two free shower caps
Plush. ................... Top and bottom sheets
Gentle breezes. .......... Occasional Gale-force winds
Light and more...
A little boy says "mom can I take a shower with you?" She says " yes if you dont look up or down" so they got in the shower and the boy looks up"What are thoughs?" he says "They must be head lights" then he looked down and said"whats that, it must be a garage" The next day the little boy says "daddy can I take a shower with you?" he said "yes but dont look down" so when he got in the shower he looked down. "Whats that? it must be a snake." That night he asked "mommy daddy can i sleep with you?" "they sai "yes but dont look under the covers" so he looked and yelled "Mommy turn on your headlights the snakes going into the garage!!!"
Little Johnny has to stay at Grandma's for the weekend. Being an old school gal, bathing Little Johnny with her, Grandma sees no harm. So, there they are in the shower and Johnny points to Grandma's crotch and says, "Grandma, what's that?!?" Grandma, somewhat shocked, quickly replies, "That's my beaver, Johnny." "Oh, okay." And this answer seems to appease Johnny's curiousity. Well, Johnny returns home, and one morning, Mom is running late for work. She decides that to save time, she'd bathe Johnny with her. Off to the shower, and once again, Johnny sees something not so familiar to him. "Mom, what's that?" asks Johnny pointing to Mom's nether regions. Taken back, Mom says, "Johnny, that's my beaver." Johnny replies, "I thought so. I think Grandma's is dead. Its tongue is hanging out and its all gray and wrinkled!"
When Chelsea Clinton was young she walked in on her mom getting out of the
shower. Pointing to her chest she asked her "What are those?"
Hiliary's response was "Oh honey, those are my breasts."
Chelsea asked "Will I get breasts?"
"Yes, when you're older." said Hillary.
A day or two later Chelsea walked in on her dad getting out of the shower.
Pointing towards his penis, she asked "What's that?"
Bill responded "Oh honey, that's my penis."
Chelsea asked "Will I get a penis?"
Bill responded, "Yes, when your mother leaves."