Silk Jokes / Recent Jokes
A biologist phones his wife from his office and says, "Honey, something has just come up, I realize its not my field season, but I have to visit my field site for a week. So, would you pack my clothes, my field equipment and my blue silk pajamas? I'll be home in 1 hour to pick them up." A week later he returned. "Did you have a good trip, dear?" his wife asked. "Oh, it was just a typical field trip, you know, work work work," he exclaimed, and added "But you forgot to pack my blue silk pajamas." "No I didn't," she replied. "I put them in the box of field equipment!"
A cab driver reaches the Pearly Gates and announces his presence to St. Peter, who looks him up in his Big Book. Upon reading the entry for the cabbie, St. Peter invites him to pick up a silk robe and a golden staff and to proceed into Heaven. A preacher is next in line behind the cabby and has been watching these proceedings with interest. He announces himself to St. Peter. Upon scanning the preacher's entry in the Big Book, St. Peter furrows his brow and says, "Okay, we'll let you in, but take that cloth robe and wooden staff." The preacher is astonished and replies, "But I am a man of the cloth. You gave that cab driver a gold staff and a silk robe. Surely I rate higher than a cabbie." St. Peter responded matter-of-factly: "This is heaven and up here, we are interested in results. When you preached, people slept. When the cabbie drove his taxi, people prayed."
The Big Horse Race Horses in the race are:1. Passionate Lady2. Bare Belly3. Silk Panties4. Conscience5. Jockey Shorts6. Clean Sheets7. Thighs8. Big Johnson9. Heavy Bosum10. Merry CherryAt the Post:They're off! Conscience is left behind at the post.Jockey Shorts and Silk Panties are off in a hurry.Heavy Bosum is being pressured.Passionate lady is caught between Thighs and Big Johnson in a very tight spot.At the Halfway Mark it's Bare Belly on top.Thighs opens up and Big Johnson is pressed in.Heavy Bosum is being pushed hard against Clean Sheets.Passionate Lady and Thighs are working hard on Bare Belly.Bare Belly is under terrific pressure from Big Johnson.At The Stretch Merry Cherry cracks under the strain.Big Johnson is making a final drive.Passionate Lady is coming.At The Finish It's Big Johnson giving everything he's got and Passionate Lady takes everything Big Johnson has to offer.It looks like a dead heat but Big Johnson squirts through and wins by a head.Heavy Bosum weakens and more...
Online computer users may engage in what is affectionately known as "cybersex". Often the fantasies typed into keyboards and shared through internet phone lines get pretty raunchy However, as you'll see below, one of the two cyber-surfers in the following transcript of an online chat doesn't seem to quite get the point of cyber sex. Then again, maybe he does...
Wellhung: Hello, Sweetheart. What do you look like?
Sweetheart: I am wearing a red silk blouse, a miniskirt and high heels. I work out every day, I'm toned and perfect. My measurements are 36-24-36. What do you look like?
Wellhung: I'm 6'3" and about 250 pounds. I wear glasses and I have on a pair of blue sweat pants I just bought from WalMart. I'm also wearing a T-shirt with a few spots of barbecue sauce on it from dinner... it smells funny.
Sweetheart: I want you. Would you like to screw me?
Wellhung: OK...sure.
Sweetheart: We're in my bedroom. There's soft music playing on the stereo, more...
Online computer users often engage in cyber sex. However, one of the two cyber-surfers in the following transcript doesn't seem to quite get the point of cyber sex. Then again, maybe he does...
Wellhung: Hello, Sweetheart. What do you look like?
Sweetheart: I am wearing a red silk blouse, a miniskirt and high heels. I work out every day, I'm toned and perfect. My measurements are 36-24-
36. What do you look like?
Wellhung: I'm 6'3" and about 250 pounds. I wear glasses and I have on a pair of blue sweat pants I just bought from Walmart. I'm also wearing a T-shirt with a few spots of barbecue sauce on it from dinner...it smells funny.
Sweetheart: I want you. Would you like to screw me? Wellhung: OK
Sweetheart: We're in my bedroom. There's soft music playing on the stereo and candles on my dresser and night table. I'm looking up into your eyes, smiling. My hand works its way down to your crotch and begins to fondle your huge, swelling bulge.
Wellhung: I'm more...
Online computer users often engage in cyber sex. However, one of the two cyber-surfers in the following transcript doesn't seem to quite get the point of cyber sex. Then again, maybe he does...
Wellhung: Hello, Sweetheart. What do you look like?
Sweetheart: I am wearing a red silk blouse, a miniskirt and high heels. I work out every day, I'm toned and perfect. My measurements are 36-24-
36. What do you look like?
Wellhung: I'm 6'3" and about 250 pounds. I wear glasses and I have on a pair of blue sweat pants I just bought from Walmart. I'm also wearing a T-shirt with a few spots of barbecue sauce on it from dinner...it smells funny.
Sweetheart: I want you. Would you like to screw me? Wellhung: OK
Sweetheart: We're in my bedroom. There's soft music playing on the stereo and candles on my dresser and night table. I'm looking up into your eyes, smiling. My hand works its way down to your crotch and begins to fondle your huge, swelling bulge.
Wellhung: I'm more...
Online computer users often engage in cyber sex. However, one of the two cyber-surfers in the following transcript doesn't seem to quite get the point of cyber sex. Then again, maybe he does...Wellhung: Hello, Sweetheart. What do you look like? Sweetheart: I am wearing a red silk blouse, a miniskirt and high heels. I work out every day, I'm toned and perfect. My measurements are 36-24-36. What do you look like? Wellhung: I'm 6'3" and about 250 pounds. I wear glasses and I have on a pair of blue sweat pants I just bought from Walmart. I'm also wearing a T-shirt with a few spots of barbecue sauce on it from dinner...it smells funny.Sweetheart: I want you. Would you like to screw me? Wellhung: OKSweetheart: We're in my bedroom. There's soft music playing on the stereo and candles on my dresser and night table. I'm looking up into your eyes, smiling. My hand works its way down to your crotch and begins to fondle your huge, swelling bulge.Wellhung: I'm gulping, I'm beginning to sweat. more...