Smythe Jokes / Recent Jokes

Mr. Perkins, the biology instructor at a posh suburban girl's junior
college, said during class, "Miss Smythe, would you please name the
organ of the human body, which under the appropriate conditions, expands to six
times its normal size, and define the conditions."
Miss Smythe gasped, then said freezingly, "Mr. Perkins, I don't think
that is a proper question to ask me. I assure you my parents will hear of
this." With that she sat down red-faced. Unperturbed, Mr. Perkins called on
Miss Johnson and asked the same question. Miss Johnson, with composure,
replied "The pupil of the eye, in dim light."
"Correct," said Mr. Perkins. "And now, Miss Smythe, I have three things
to say to you. One, you have not studied your lesson. Two, you have a
dirty mind. And three, you will some day be faced with a dreadful
disappointment."

Mr. Perkins, the biology instructor at a posh suburban girl's junior college, said during class, "Miss Smythe, would you please name the organ of the human body, which under the appropriate conditions, expands to six times its normal size, and define the conditions."

Miss Smythe gasped, then said freezingly, "Mr. Perkins, I don't think that is a proper question to ask me. I assure you my parents will hear of this!" With that she sat down red-faced.

Unperturbed, Mr. Perkins called on Miss Johnson and asked the same question.

Miss Johnson, with composure, replied, "The pupil of the eye, in dim light."

"Correct," said Mr. Perkins. "And now, Miss Smythe, I have three things to say to you.

"One, you have not studied your lesson.
"Two, you have a dirty mind.
"And three, you will some day be faced with a dreadful disappointment."

Little Susie was Mommy's helper. She helped set the table when company was due for dinner. Soon, everything was on, Mr. Smythe the guest came in, and everyone sat down. Then Mother noticed something was missing...." Susie, dear," she said, "You didn't put a knife and fork at Mr. Smythe's place." "But, Mommy, I thought he wouldn't need them," explained Susie. "Daddy says he always eats like a horse!"

Mr. Perkins, the biology instructor at a posh suburban girl's junior college, said during class,' 'Miss Smythe, would you please name the organ of the human body, which under the appropriate conditions, expands to six times its normal size, and define the conditions.''

Miss Smythe gasped, then said freezingly,' 'Mr. Perkins, I don't think that is a proper question to ask me. I assure you my parents will hear of this.'' With that she sat down red-faced.

Unperturbed, Mr. Perkins called on Miss Johnson and asked the same question. Miss Johnson, with composure, replied,' 'The pupil of the eye, in dim light.''

''Correct,'' said Mr. Perkins.' 'And now, Miss Smythe, I have three things to say to you. One, you have not studied your lesson. Two, you have a dirty mind. And three, you will some day be faced with a dreadful disappointment.''

Tadbury was an entrepreneur with a reputation for dishonesty. One day, he went to Smythe, a new but talented lawyer. He told Smythe that he wouldn't pay any fees unless there seemed a clear cause of legal action. Smythe agreed to evaluate the case. After a lengthy discussion, Smythe told Tadbury, "Your case is absolutely airtight. The other party is dead wrong, and cannot hope to win the case. I will be happy to represent you for a retainer of £10, 000." Tadbury then got up to leave. The lawyer protested, "But I told you that your case was good, and you agreed to pay me if you had a claim! You have to pay me my fee!" Tadbury replied, "Absolutely not. I'm leaving town. I told you the other guy's side."