Soak Jokes

A business executive injured his leg skiing one weekend. By the time he got home Saturday, the leg was very swollen and he was having difficulty walking, so he called his physician at his home. The doctor told him to soak it in hot water.
He tried soaking it in hot water but the leg became more swollen and painful. His maid saw him limping and said, "I don't know, I'm only a maid, but I always thought it was better to use cold water, not hot, for swelling."
He tried switching to cold water and the swelling rapidly subsided. On Sunday afternoon he called his Dr. again to complain. "Say, what kind of a doctor are you anyway? You told me to soak my leg in hot water and it got worse. My maid told me to use cold water and it got better."
"Really?" answered the doctor, "I don't understand it. My maid said to use hot water."

A business executive injured his leg skiing one weekend. By the time he got home Saturday, the leg was very swollen and he was having difficulty walking, so he called his physician at his home. The doctor told him to soak it in hot water.
He tried soaking it in hot water but the leg became more swollen and painful. His maid saw him limping and said, "I don't know, I'm only a maid, but I always thought it was better to use cold water, not hot, for swelling."
He tried switching to cold water and the swelling rapidly subsided. On Sunday afternoon he called his Dr. again to complain. "Say, what kind of a doctor are you anyway? You told me to soak my leg in hot water and it got worse. My maid told me to use cold water and it got better."
"Really?" answered the doctor, "I don't understand it. My maid said to use hot water."

There were two factories in New York City. One of them made maternity frocks for expectant mothers, so they were called the "Mother Frockers".
The factory across the street made corks for wine bottles. They had to soak the corks before they could put them into the bottles, so they were called the "Cork Soakers".
One day a Cork Soaker didn't soak a cork long enough and it flew out of one of the bottles and hit one of the Mother Frockers in the eye.
That made all the Mother Frockers mad at the Cork Soakers, so they went outside and had the biggest Mother-Frocking Cork Soaking fight you ever saw...

A wife comes home at 3am and her husband meets her at the door.He askes her where she got the big diamond ring that she is wearing? She says,"I won it playing BINGO, run me a tub of water, I want to soak."
The next night the wife comes home at 3am and her husband meets her at the door and she has on a beautiful fur coat. He asks her where she got it from and she says, "I won it playing BINGO. Run me a tub of water, I want to soak."
The next night the wife comes in at 3am driving a new convertible. Her husband asks her where she got the new car from and she says, "I won it playing BINGO. Run me a tub of water, I want to soak."
She undresses and goes into the bathroom then comes right back out and asks her husband, "Why did you only put one inch of water in the bathtub?"
Her husband replies, "I didn't want you to get your BINGO card wet!"