Specialist Jokes / Recent Jokes

In Singapore, more than 50 toilet cleaners will be promoted to "restroom specialist" upon completing a 64 hour course taught by Japanese experts in the latest toilet technology, The Straits Times reported.
I sat here going over about 50 potential jokes regarding the title change, or spending 64 hours in a bathroom, or the term "latest toilet technology"- instead I choose to let you post punchlines in the comments section, best one wins a "My Favorites" spot (lucky you, I know).
All I will say is "restroom specialist"?!?? We have fancy names for horseshit too.

A guy is suffering from severe headaches for years with no relief. After trying all the usual cures he's referred to a headache specialist by his family doctor. The doctor asks him what his symptoms are and he replies, "I get these blinding headaches; kind of like a knife across my scalp and..."
He is interrupted by the doctor, "And a heavy throbbing right behind the left ear".
"Yes! Exactly! How did you know?"
"Well I am the world's greatest headache specialist, you know. But I myself suffered from that same type of headache for many years. It is caused by a tension in the scalp muscles. This is how I cured it: Every day I would give my wife oral sex. When she came she would squeeze her legs together with all her strength and the pressure would relieve the tension in my head. Try that every day for two weeks and come back and let me know how it goes".
Two weeks go by and the man is back, "Well, how do you more...

A guy is suffering from severe headaches for years with no relief.
After trying all the usual cures he's referred to a headache specialist by his family doctor. The doctor asks him what his symptoms are and he replies, "I get these blinding headaches; kind of like a knife across my scalp and.."
He is interrupted by the doctor, "And a heavy throbbing right behind the left ear".
"Yes! Exactly! How did you know?"
"Well I am the world's greatest headache specialist, you know. But I myself suffered from that same type of headache for many years. It is caused by a tension in the scalp muscles.
This is how I cured it: Every day I would give my wife oral sex. When she came she would squeeze her legs together with all her strength and the pressure would relieve the tension in my head.
Try that every day for two weeks and come back and let me know how it goes".
Two weeks go by and the man is back, "Well, how do you more...

A blonde goes into the beauty and hair parlor with her walkman on her head." I need to take that walkman off your head," says the beauty specialist as she notices the blonde." You can't! I'll die!" retorts the blonde." I can't cut your hair with the walkman on your ears!" says the beauty specialist getting annoyed." I said you can't take it off, or I'll die!"The beauty specialist, outraged and flustered, grabs the walkman and throws it off the head of the blonde. Within seconds, the blonde dies. When the specialist picks up the walkman to listen, she hears it repeating "breath in, breath out, breath in".

A blonde goes into the beauty and hair parlor with her walkman on her head.
"I need to take that walkman off your head," says the beauty specialist as she notices the blonde.
"You can't! I'll die!" retorts the blonde.
"I can't cut your hair with the walkman on your ears!" says the beauty specialist getting annoyed.
"I said you can't take it off, or I'll die!"
The beauty specialist, outraged and flustered, grabs the walkman and throws it off the head of the blonde. Within seconds, the blonde dies. When the specialist picks up the walkman to listen, she hears it repeating "breath in, breath out, breath in".

A blonde goes into the beauty and hair parlor with her walkman on her head."I need to take that walkman off your head," says the beauty specialist as she notices the blonde."You can't! I'll die!" retorts the blonde."I can't cut your hair with the walkman on your ears!" says the beauty specialist getting annoyed."I said you can't take it off, or I'll die!"The beauty specialist, outraged and flustered, grabs the walkman and throws it off the head of the blonde. Within seconds, the blonde dies. When the specialist picks up the walkman to listen, she hears it repeating "breath in, breath out, breath in".

Q: How many doctors does it take to screw in a light bulb?

A: Three. One to find a bulb specialist, one to find a bulb installation specialist, and one to bill it all to Medicare.