Spell Jokes

TEACHER: Why are you late?
BALGOBIN: Because of the sign.
TEACHER: What sign?
BALGOBIN: The one that says, "School Ahead, Go Slow."
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TEACHER: Balgobin, why are you doing your math sums on the floor?
BALGOBIN: You told me to do it without using tables!
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-TEACHER: Balgobin, how do you spell "crocodile"?
BALGOBIN: "K-R-O-K-O-D-A-I-L"
TEACHER: No, that's wrong
BALGOBIN: Maybe it's wrong, but you asked me how I spell it!
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-TEACHER: What is the chemical formula for water?
BALGOBIN: "HIJKLMNO! "!!
TEACHER: What are you talking about?
BALGOBIN: Yesterday you said it's H to O!
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-TEACHER: Balgobin, go to the map and find North America.
BALGOBIN: Here it is!
TEACHER: more...

Buckwheat and Darla were in school and the teacher asked Darla, 'How do you spell 'dumb'?"Darla says, "d-u-m-b, dumb."The teacher says, "Very good. Now use it in a sentence."She responds, "Buckwheat is dumb.""Now spell 'stupid'."Darla says, "s-t-u-p-i-d."The teacher says, "Very good. Now use it in a sentence."Darla says, "Buckwheat is stupid."Then the teacher call on Buckwheat and asks, "Buckwheat, spell dictate."Buckwheat stands up and says, "d-i-c-t-a-t-e, dictate."The teacher says, "Very good. Now use it in the a sentence." "I may be dumb and I may be stupid, but Darla says my dictate good!"

There is black boy, Malcolm; a white boy, James; and a Mexican girl
Jaunita in a spelling bee at school.
To win the spelling bee the student must spell the word correctly and use
the word in a sentence.
Teacher: James, spell dictate.
James: d-e-c-t-a-t-e
Teacher: Sorry that's wrong.
Teacher: Juanita spell dictate.
Juanita: d-i-k-t-a-t-e
Teacher: Sorry that's wrong.
Teacher: Malcolm spell dictate.
Malcolm: d-i-c-t-a-t-e
Teacher: Correct Malcolm. Now use it in a sentence.
Malcolm: Juanita, how my dic tate las nite?

This little old lady walks into an ice cream parlor and asks for 2 scoops of chocolate ice cream. The man behind the counter says 'I'm sorry, we are all out of chocolate ice cream'.The lady says 'OK, I'll take one scoop of chocolate ice cream in a cup.'The man says 'Ma-am, we are all out of chocolate'.The little old lady says 'OK, then I'll have a single scoop of chocolate in a cone'.The man, a little more irritated this time says 'Ok, lady. Spell van as in vanilla'.The lady says V A NThe man says, 'OK, spell straw as in strawberry'.The lady says S T R A W.The man says, 'OK, now spell fuck as in chocolate'.The lady says there ain't no fuck in chocolate.The man says, 'Lady, that's what I've been trying to tell you all along!

Chuck Norris does not use spell check. If he happens to misspell a word, Oxford will simply change the actual spelling of it.