Stage Jokes / Recent Jokes
Netscape employees found a gigantic blue stage prop in the shape of an' e' in front of their company's front door one recent morning.
The night before, the same 10-by-12-foot stage prop -- which represents the logo for Microsoft's Internet Explorer, or IE, -- was spotted at a Microsoft bash in San Francisco.
Netscape had the last laugh in the prank, though. Netscape employees placed a 12-foot foam likeness of their mascot' Mozilla' -- a green Godzilla-like creature on top of the' e'.
Mozilla held a placard that read:
Netscape -- 72
Microsoft - 18
referring to recent market share data.
The following, said to be a true story as seen by millions of viewers on a Spanish T.V. Channel:
The parents of a teenage girl decided to put their daughter's name forward for a Surprise Game Show - she idolised Teen-Age Pop Star "Ricky Martin", and they arranged for TV cameras to be placed throughout the house.
The house was then left empty with Ricky Martin hidden in the wardrobe in the girls bedroom - all set to give the daughter a wonderful surprise. However, upon returning home from school and finding the house empty, the daughter made her way down to the kitchen where she opened the fridge and removed a tin of pate - at this stage the live TV audience is wondering "what the hell is going on?
She then went back upstairs to her bedroom where she proceeded to remove all her clothes and spread pate all over her triangle of womanhood (at this stage Ricky Martin is still hidden inside the wardrobe, and half of Spain is seeing a young more...
{I heard this years ago - have no idea where it first came from}
The choir director selected the 6-year-old little boy with the sweetest
face for the opening scene of the play. "Now, all you have to do is,
when I direct the choir to sing '...and the angel lit the candle', you
come onstage and light all the candles."
"I can do it - I can do it!" the little boy said, excited to be the
one picked.
Rehearsals came and went, and finally the big night arrived. The choir was
in grand voice, the stage was beautifully decorated with dozens of unlit
candles all around, awaiting the moment when the cute littlest angel made
his interest.
The director gave the downbeat, the orchestra began to play, and the
choir swept into the introductory lines, ending with an expectant
"...and the angel lit the candle," and everyone looked stage right
for the entrance. No little boy. The director gave the downbeat
again, more...
A man took his wife to a Broadway show. During the first act intermission, he had to urinate in the worst way.
He hurried to the back of the theatre and searched in vain for the men's room.
At last he came upon a fountain surrounded by pretty foliage. He realized that he had wandered backstage. Noting that no one was around, and in desperatation, he opened his pants and pissed into the fountain.
He had difficulty finding his way back to the auditorium, and by the time he sat down next to his wife, the curtain was up and the actors were moving about on the stage.
"Did I miss much of he second act?" he whispered.
"Miss it?" she said, "You were in it."
Aerosmith's Steven Tyler fell from stage at a concert in South Dakota during the song "Love in an Elevator". Going down?
A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us."
The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute."
The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us."
The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look."
The father begins...
"The curtain raises, I am centre stage in my finest tuxedo suit with my draling wife by my side, my wife then drops to her knees facing the audience who quickly notice she is not wearing any panties as a big brown log of shit emerges slowly from her ass, I begin to sing 'Yankee Doodle' while my daughter unzips my fly and pulls my cock out and begins to suck me off, meanwhile my son slides across the stage and catches the shit emerging from my wife's ass, chews it around a bit then sprays it all over the rest of us, more...
TAN TOCK SENG, SINGAPORE -- The National Pimples Center, NPC, is planning to stage the largest charity show sometime next year to raise funds for the treatment of severe acnes. "We have decided to stage such a charity show to raise fund for our acnes patients following the success of the other charity shows", said Ms Agnes Pim, public relation manager of NPC. She was referring to the NKF Local and Foreign Celebrities Charity Shows, President Star Charity Show and the recent SNHA Charity Show. "We believe this Charity Show of ours will be the best, and will received the largest amount of donation ever. We have restructured our organization to link our executives annual bonuses to the amount of donation received. We believe that this compensation program will enable us to achieve our target of S$1 billion in donation monies.", said Ms Agnes Pim. She also indicated that it should not be too difficult to raise such a huge amount given the soft-heartedness of most more...