Statistician Jokes / Recent Jokes

There are three kinds of lies: lies, damned lies, and statistics.

Logic is a systematic method for getting the wrong conclusion with confidence.

Statistics is a systematic method for getting the wrong conclusion with 95% confidence.

In God we trust. All others must bring data.

Statistics are like a bikini. What they reveal is suggestive, but what they conceal is vital.

79. 48% of all statistics are made up on the spot.

If there is a 50-50 chance that something can go wrong, then 9 times out of ten it will.

Three percent exceeds 2 percent by 50 percent, not by 1 percent.