Storekeeper Jokes / Recent Jokes

A woman from Chelm went to the market one day to buy herring and a loaf of bread. "How much is it?" she asked the storekeeper.

"14 cents," answered the storekeeper to the lady."14 cents! For what?" asked the lady.The storekeeper explained: The herring costs 7 cents, and the loaf of bread costs 7 cents also. So together it comes to 14 cents.""I know different. To the best of my recollection, 7 and 7 is 11.""What are your saying?""As far as I know, 7 and 7 is 11...I had already had 4 children when my first husband died. When I married a second time, my second husband also had 4 children from his first wife. After getting married, we had 3 children together. So each of us had 7 children, and together we had 11! Obviously, 7 and 7 is 11."

On opening his new store, a man received a bouquet of flowers. He became dismayed on reading the enclosed card, that it expressed "Deepest Sympathy".
While puzzling over the message, his telephone rang. It was the florist, apologizing for having sent the wrong card. "Oh, it's alright." said the storekeeper. "I'm a businessman and I understand how these things can happen."
"But," added the florist, "I accidentally sent your card to a funeral party." "Well, what did it say?" ask the storekeeper. "'Congratulations on your new location'." was the reply.

On opening his new store, a man received a bouquet of flowers. He became dismayed on reading the enclosed card, that it expressed "Deepest Sympathy".While puzzling over the message, his telephone rang. It was the florist, apologizing for having sent the wrong card. "Oh, it's alright." said the storekeeper. "I'm a businessman and I understand how these things can happen.""But," added the florist, "I accidentally sent your card to a funeral party." "Well, what did it say?" ask the storekeeper. "'Congratulations on your new location'." was the reply.

On opening his new store, a man received a bouquet of flowers. He became dismayed on reading the enclosed card, which expressed "Deepest Sympathy".
While puzzling over the message, his telephone rang. It was the florist, apologizing for having sent the wrong card.
"Oh, it's all right," said the storekeeper. "I'm a businessman and I understand how these things can happen."
"But," added the florist, "I accidentally sent your card to a funeral party."
"Well, what did it say?" ask the storekeeper.
"'Congratulations on your new location'," was the reply.

A Jewish woman from Chelm went to the market one day to buy herring and a loaf of bread. "How much is it?" she asked the storekeeper.
"14 cents," answered the storekeeper to the lady.
"14! For what?" asked the Jewish lady. "I think it's 11."
The storekeeper explained: The herring costs 7 cents, and the loaf of bread costs 7 cents also. So together it comes to 14 cents."
"I know different. To the best of my recollection, 7 and 7 is 11." "What are your saying?"
"As far as I know, 7 and 7 is 11...I had already had 4 children when my first husband died. When I married a second time, my second husband also had 4 children from his first wife. After getting married, we had 3 children together. So each of us had 7 children, and together we had 11! Obviously, 7 and 7 is 11."

A lady once went to a pet store and asked the storekeeper for a parrot that could speak. The storekeeper showed the lady into a room where there were many birds he then showed her a parrot which was sitting on a swing in it's cage and had two strings tied to both his feet, the storekeeper then told the lady that if she pulled the string tied to the left the parrot woud say" good day " and if she pulled the string tied to the right leg it would say " how de do " the lady pulled the strings one at a time and the parrot said just what the storekeeper said it would say. Then the lady asked the storekeeper what the parrot would do if she pulled both the strings at the same time and then the parrot replied " i'll fall off the swing you bubleheaded idiot ".

A woman from Chelm went to the market one day to buy herring and a loaf of bread. "How much is it?" she asked the storekeeper.
"14 cents," answered the storekeeper to the lady.
"14 cents! For what?" asked the lady.
The storekeeper explained: "The herring costs 7 cents, and the loaf of bread costs 7 cents also. So together it comes to 14 cents."
"I know different. To the best of my recollection, 7 and 7 is 11."
"What are you saying?"
"As far as I know, 7 and 7 is 11. I had already had 4 children when my first husband died. When I married a second time, my second husband also had 4 children from his first wife. After getting married, we had 3 children together. So each of us had 7 children, and together we had 11!
Obviously, 7 and 7 is 11."