Strange Jokes / Recent Jokes

A lawyer, named Thomas Strange, was shopping for a tombstone. After he had made his selection, the stonecutter asked him what inscription he would like on it.
"Here lies Thomas Strange, an honest man and a lawyer," responded the lawyer.
"Sorry, but I can't do that," replied the stonecutter. "In this state, it's against the law to bury two people in the same grave, and the authorities would be confused. However, I could put' Here lies an honest lawyer.'"
"But that won't let people know who it is" protested the lawyer.
"Sure they will," replied the stonecutter. "Everyone who reads it will think,' That's Strange!'"

This may sound like an urban legend - but it actually happened to my Dad!
My father work requires him to make several "home calls", one of which resulted in the following amusing tale:
As he arrived at the house in question, he knocked on the door - and as he walked in a dog ran in behind him and headed straight for the lounge.
Whilst discussing the "deal" the dog was leaping all over both of them - my dad thought it was rather strange that this was going unnoticed by the householder.
He also thought it was rather strange that the dog was allowed inside the room whilst they were talking. After several minutes the wife walked in the room with a tray of drinks and the dog just ran up to her and knocked the tray out of her hand, spllling tea all over the place - it was at this point my dad decided to casually ask: "How long have you had the dog?"
Their reply was "Oh - we thought it was yours!"... It was a stray!!!
Another of more...

A man is driving down the road and breaks down near a monastery. He goes to the monastery, knocks on the door, and says, "My car broke down. Do you think I could stay the night?"The monks graciously accept him, feed him dinner, even fix his car. As the man tries to fall asleep, he hears a strange sound. The next morning, he asks the monks what the sound was, but they say, "We can't tell you. You're not a monk."The man is disappointed but thanks them anyway and goes about his merry way.Some years later, the same man breaks down in front of the same monastery. The monks again accept him, feed him, even fix his car. That night, he hears the same strange noise that he had heard years earlier.The next morning, he asks what it is, but the monks reply, "We can't tell you. You're not a monk."The man says, "All right, all right. I'm dying to know. If the only way I can find out what that sound was is to become a monk, how do I become a monk?"The monks more...

Although they truly hated each other, a man and a woman remained married for years. Whenever they had a confrontation, screams and yelling would be heard deep into the night. The neighbors feared the man the most and would constantly hear him making the same statement to his wife, "When I die, I promise you I will dig my way up and out of the grave to come back and haunt you for the rest of your days."
Everyone believed he practiced black magic and was responsible for strange and unexplainable sounds and disappearances in the area. He was deeply feared and thrived on the respect it garnished.
He died suddenly under strange circumstances and his casket remained closed at the funeral. After the burial, his wife went immediately to the local bar and began to party as if there was no tomorrow.
Her partying and the gaiety in her actions were becoming extreme when the neighbors, who were concerned about her, finally got together and approached her.
"Are you more...

The following is supposedly a true story. To be included, besides being true, the story is most likely strange, weird, surprising, or funny.LOS ANGELES TIMES, September 14:According to a database maintained by Academic Guidance Services, there are 3,000 scholarships earmarked for golf caddies, newspaper carriers, glee clubbers, and band members.Juanita College in Pennsylvania gives grants to needy left-handers.Parents whose children were born on June 12, 1979 can plan ahead to apply for a scholarship to the Rochester Institute of Technology in honor of the school's 150th anniversary.Bucknell University gives grants to students who do not use alcohol, tobacco, or narcotics and don't engage in strenuous activities.A judge in Seattle uses the fines he collects from prostitutes to finance scholarships for their reformed sisters who want to return to school.

A man and his wife were driving their RV across country and were nearing a town spelled Kissimee. They noted the strange spelling and tried to figure how to pronounce it - KISS-a-me; kis-A-me; kis-a-ME.
They grew more perplexed as they drove into the town. Since they were hungry, the pulled into a place to get something to eat.
At the counter, the man said to the waitress: "My wife and I can't seem to be able to figure out how to pronounce this place. Will you tell me where we are and say it very slowly so that I can understand."
The waitress looked at him and said: "buuurrrgerrr kiiiinnnng."

When a lawyer named Strange died, his family asked the tombstone maker to inscribe the words, "Here lies Strange, a lawyer and an honest man" on his stone. Insisting that such an inscription would be confusing, for passersby would think that three men were buried in the same plot, the inscriber suggested an alternative. His suggestion was to inscribe the words, "Here lies a man who was both a lawyer and honest."
That way, anyone who walked by and read the inscription would be sure to remark "That's Strange."