Stream Jokes / Recent Jokes

True story told to me by my uncle Fred D. after my asking what was in Aunt Merle's cassarole dish.
During the depression years, Fred and his buddy were driving trucks on a Govt. road building project up in the Dakotas.
It was noon and they stopped their trucks at the roadside beside a small stream. There was an Indian encampment there between the road and the stream. One of the braves came up the hill to them and told them they could come down and eat with them out of the kettle.
They took their tin plates and cups and went down to eat with the Indians. Fred said that he knew what to expect so he took the ladle and put the stew on his plate and went over to sit on a log and eat.
But his buddy stayed behind and was stirring and poking into the stew, obviously trying to identify what was in it. Then one brave spoke up in a loud voice, "Ugh! Dig deep. Dog on bottom".
I never did learn what Aunt Merle put in her cassarole.

One fine, sunny morning, a priest took a walk in the local forest. He was walking by a small stream when, sitting on a nearby toadstool, he noticed a sad, sad-looking frog. "What's wrong with you?" said the priest.

"Well," said the frog, "the reason I am so sad on this fine day is because I wasn't always a frog."

"Really!" said the priest. "Can you explain?"

"Once upon a time I was an 11-year-old Choirboy at your very church. I too was walking by this stream when I was confronted by the wicked witch of the forest.' Let me pass!' I cried, but to no avail. She called me a cheeky little boy and with a flash of her wand, turned me into the frog you now see before you."

"That's an incredible story!" said the priest. "Is there no way of reversing the witch's spell?"

"Yes," said the frog. "It is said that if a nice kind person would pick me up, more...

The setting is a quiet and serene country stream weaving through the gentle hills of a grassy plain. All is quiet and still, and, lo, a small fly hovers a few inches above the quiet waters of the stream.
Beneath the water floats a small fish. The fish thinks to itself, if that fly just drops two inches, I will be able to jump out of the water and catch it.
Now, standing on the bank of the stream lurks a bear. The bear looks at the scene and thinks to itself, if that fly drops just two inches, then the fish will jump out of the water to catch it, and I will be able to dash into the stream and snap up the fish in my mouth.
Crouching nearby the stream, in the tall grass, waits a hunter. The hunter looks at the scene and thinks to himself, if that fly drops just two inches, then the fish will spring out of the water to catch it, then bear will dash out into the river, and I’ll get a clear shot at the bear.
Sitting at the entrance to its hole, is a small field mouse. more...

A man and woman where on their honeymoon after a long and very happy courtship. On their honeymoon, they decide to take their horses through the beautiful mountain passes of Europe. As the horses were crossing a small stream, the womans horse mis-steps and jostles the mans wife. Once across the stream, the man dismounts, walks over to the horse, and stares into its eyes. Finally, he states, "Thats one." The man remounts his horse and they continue their ride. A bit further down the path, the womans horse stumbles when stepping over a fallen tree. The man dismounts, stares the horse in the eyes, and boldly states, "Thats two!" He returns to his saddle and they move on. As the afternoon sun began to set, the womans horse once again lost its footing on a mossy slope. The man dismounts, moves to the womans horse, and helps his wife out of the saddle the man. Moving to the front o f the horse he stares it in the eyes and firmly says, "Thats three," removes a more...

A man and woman where on their honeymoon after a long and very happy courtship. On their honeymoon, they decide to take their horses through the beautiful mountain passes of Europe. As the horses were crossing a small stream, the woman's horse mis-steps and jostles the man's wife. Once across the stream, the man dismounts, walks over to the horse, and stares into its eyes. Finally, he states, "That's one." The man remounts his horse and they continue their ride.
A bit further down the path, the woman's horse stumbles when stepping over a fallen tree. The man dismounts, stares the horse in the eyes, and boldly states, "That's two!" He returns to his saddle and they move on.
As the afternoon sun began to set, the woman's horse once again lost its footing on a mossy slope. The man dismounts, moves to the woman's horse, and helps his wife out of the saddle the man. Moving to the front of the horse he stares it in the eyes and firmly says, "That's more...

A long time ago when America was being settled, a group of people headed west in a wagon train from the east coast. The wagon train leader was very inexperienced and soon the people realized they were hopelessly lost. After wandering for weeks and weeks, their food supplies were gone and winter was fast approaching.
As the group came over a hill they saw the first person they had seen for days; a strange old man sitting beneath a tree. The leader of the wagon train approached the man. "Can you help us? We're heading west but we're lost and all our food is gone. We're starving."
The old man replied, "You know, I can see the future... Wait... I'm getting a vision now." He held one hand to his brow and closed his eyes in concentration. "It's coming. Oh yes, I see, I see."
"I know what you must do. Go up this hill and down the other side. Go through the forest and across the stream. Then go up the next hill and down to the valley below. There more...

One day this non flying fly was setting on the bank of a stream trying to figure a way across. In the stream was a trout watching the fly, the trout said to himself, if that fly comes down I'll jump up and eat him. Back in the edge of the woods was a bear watching the trout watching the fly, the bear says to himself, if that trout jumps up I'll jump down and eat him. A little further back in the woods is a hunter watching the bear, watching the trout, watching the fly, and the hunter says to himself, if that bear jumps down there I'll jump up and shoot him. A little further back in the woods is a mouse watching the hunter, watching the bear, watching the trout, watching the fly, and the mouse says to himself if that hunter jumps up to shoot that bear he'll drop that sandwich and I'll jump on the sandwich. A little further back in the woods is a cat watching the mouse, watching the hunter, watching the bear, watching the trout, watching the fly, and the cat says to himself, if that more...