Summer Jokes / Recent Jokes
What do you call a snowman in the summer?
A puddle
What do you call a Snowman in the Tropics?
Lost!
What do you call a snowman on roller blades?
A snowmobile!
What do you get if cross a snowman and a shark?
Frost bite!
What do you get if you cross a snowman and a mobile phone?
"We're talking in the air..."
What do you get when you cross a snowman with a baker?
Frosty the Dough-man!
What do you say to a stressed snowman?
Chill out!
What does a Snowman take when he gets sick?
A chill pill!
What does a snowman's wife put on her face at night?
Cold cream!
What is a Snowman's favorite Drink?
Ice Tea!
A plain-looking coed home from school on summer vacation calmly confessed to her mother that she lost her virginity last semester. "How did it happen?" gasped the parent.
"Well, it wasn't easy," the girl admitted, "but three of my sorority sisters helped hold him down."
One summer evening during a violent thunderstorm a mother was tucking her small boy into bed. She was about to turn off the light when he asked with a tremor in his voice, "Mommy, will you sleep with me tonight?" The mother smiled and gave him a reassuring hug. "I can't dear," she said. "I have to sleep in Daddy's room." A long silence was broken at last by a shaken little voice saying, "The big sissy."
Top 10 Summer Camps you should not send your kids to: 10. Tommy Lee's---------- Camp Kickachickee9. Lorena Bobbit's------ Camp Cutaweewee8. Tanya Harding's------ Camp Wackaneenee7. Kenneth Star's------- Camp Catchacrookee6. Louis Farakahn's----- Camp Killawhitey5. O. J. Simpson's------- Camp Killachickee4. Michael Jackson's---- Camp Wannabewhitey3. President Clinton's-- Camp Getahoochie2. Ellen Degeneras's---- Camp Lickacoochie And the number one camp not to send your kid to: 1. Monica Lewinsky's---- Camp Suckapeepee
Dr. Cutter is the local Veterinarian, known for his wry humor. Hesurpassed himself one summer day when a city dog was brought to himafter an encounter with a porcupine. After almost an hour of prying, pulling, cutting and stitching, hereturned the dog to its owner, who asked what she owed."Fifteen dollars, Ma'am," he answered."Why that's simply outrageous!" she stormed. "That's what's wrong withyou Maine people, you're always trying to over charge summer visitors. Whatever do you do in the winter, when we're not being gypped here?""Raise porcupines, Ma'am."
A 60-year-old man went to the doctor for a check-up. The doctor told him, "You're in terrific shape. There's nothing wrong with you. Why, you might live forever. You have the body of a 35 year old. By the way, how old was your father when he died?" The 60 year old responded, "Who said he was dead?" The doctor was surprised and asked, "How old is he and is he very active?" The 60 year old responded, "Well, he is 82 years old and he still goes skiing three times a season and surfing three times a week during the summer." The doctor couldn't believe it. "Well, how old was your grandfather when he died?" The 60 year old responded again, "Who said he was dead?" The doctor was astonished. He said, "You mean to tell me you are 60 years old and both your father and your grandfather are alive? Is your grandfather very active?" The 60 year old said, "He goes skiing at least once a season and surfing once a week during more...