Test Jokes / Recent Jokes
Ten Signs The Police Chief Hates You
10. He sends you on drug raids.... alone.
9. He refers to you as "Our Little Mascot."
8. The job description in your contract includes "crash test dummy" and "pepper-spray test subject."
7. Instead of a gun, you were issued a water pistol.
6. He always tells you that only wimps call for back-up.
5. He lied to you about an "officer exchange program" and put you on a plane to Siberia.
4. He doesn't like to be seen with you in public.
3. He makes up "missing persons" and then sends you to look for them.
2. You always get the patrol car with the flat tire, no gas, a dead battery, and a broken air conditioner.
1. Your locker is also the broom closet!!
A first grade teacher, Ms Brooks was having trouble with one of her students.
The teacher asked, "Harry what is your problem?" Harry answered, "I'm too smart for the first Grade. My sister is in the third grade and I'm smarter than she is! I think I should be in the third grade too!"
Ms Brooks had enough. She took Harry to the principal's office. While Harry waited in the outer office, the teacher explained to the principal what the situation was. The principal told Ms Brooks he would give the boy a test and if he failed to answer
any of his questions he was to go back to the first grade and behave. She agreed. Harry was brought in and the conditions were explained to him and he agreed to take the test.
Principal: "What is 3 x 3?"
Harry: "9".
Principal: "What is 6 x 6?"
Harry: "36".
And so it went with every question the principal thought a third grade more...
This is a genuine psychological test. It is a story about a girl.....
While at the funeral of her own mother, she met this guy whom she did not know. She thought this guy was amazing, so much her dream guy she believed him to be, that she fell in love with him there and then. A few days later the girl killed her own sister.
Question:
What is her motive in killing her sister?
DON'T Scroll down until you have thought what your own answer is to this question!!!!!
(No trick answers here.)
Answer:
She was hoping that the guy would appear at the funeral again.
If you answered this correctly, you think like a psychopath. This was designed by a famous American psychologist used to test if one has the same mentality as a killer. Many arrested serial killers took part in this test and answered it correctly. If you more...
U.S. officials: N. Korea will be planning 2nd nuclear test. The third test will be on South Korea, and the fourth probably on China, maybe USA. Hey, when it gets to that point we will figure out something, said a a Senior White House Aide.
Santa Singh Applied For An Engineering Position At Deman Construction Office In Amritsar. Reddy From Chennai Applied For The Same Job And Both
Applicants Having The Same Qualifications Were Asked To Take A Test By The Department Manager Mr. Arvin Singh. Upon Completion Of The Test, The Results Showed That Both Men Only Missed One Of The Questions. The Manager Went To Santa And Said, "Thank You For Your Interest, But We've Decided To Give The Job To Reddy". Santa: And Why Would You Be Doing That? We Both Got 9 Questions Correct. This Being Punjab I Should Get The Job!" Manager: "We Have Made Our Decision Not On The Correct Answers, But On The One Question That You Got Wrong. "Santa: "And Just How Would One Incorrect Answer Be Better Than The Other?" Manager: "Simple, For The Question That Both Of You Got Wrong, Reddy Put Down' I Don't Know' As The Answer. And You Wrote' Neither Do I'!"
Ten Signs The Police Chief Hates You10. He sends you on drug raids.... alone. 9. He refers to you as "Our Little Mascot."8. The job description in your contract includes "crash test dummy" and "pepper-spray test subject."7. Instead of a gun, you were issued a water pistol. 6. He always tells you that only wimps call for back-up. 5. He lied to you about an "officer exchange program" and put you on a plane to Siberia. 4. He doesn't like to be seen with you in public. 3. He makes up "missing persons" and then sends you to look for them. 2. You always get the patrol car with the flat tire, no gas, a dead battery, and a broken air conditioner. 1. Your locker is also the broom closet!!
Away in a Test Tube
(Melody: "Away in a Manger")
Away in a test tube
My plague cultures grow
On nutrient agar
Mankind's greatest foe
It's easy to grow them
If one does it right
At thirty-five Celsius
All day and all night
Once they are ready
You can let them go
To sicken the masses
With pus-filled buboes.