Tits Jokes / Recent Jokes

Once there was a lady who had small tits. Well on day she heard about this doctor called Dr. Johnson.So of course she went to see him. He told her how he could help, but she had second thoughts about doing it. He told her to pinch her tits and sing, "
mary had a little lamb. its fleece was white as snow. anywhere that mary went that lamb was sure to go"
Well sure enough she did, and she went from eggs to oranges. she thought it worked so well she wanted to go to melons. well on day she was on a city bus and, she just started sing and pinching her tits. the guy that was sittin next to her said,"
hey you go to dr johnson dont you?"
she was like, "
yeah how did you know?"
all of a sudden he starts to hit his dick and starts to sing, "
hickory-dickory dock!"

181. Q: What do you call a blonde in a tree with a brief case?
A: Branch Manager.
182. Q: How did the dumb blonde break her leg raking leaves?
A: She fell out of the tree.
183. Q: How do you get a one-armed blonde out of a tree?
A: Wave at her.
184. Q: What do you call a smart blond?
A: A golden retriever.
185. Q: How do you check a blonde's IQ?
A: With a tire gauge.
186. Q: How does a blonde interpret
6.9?
A: A 69 interrupted by a period.
187. Q: What did the blonde say when she looked into a box of Cheerios?
A: "Oh look! Doughnut seeds!"
188. Q: Why is it okay for blondes to catch cold?
A: They don't have to worry about blowing their brains out.
189. Q: Why do blonds have two more brain cells than a cow?
A1: So they don't shit everywhere when you pull their tits.
A2: So that when you pull their tits, they don't moo.
190. Q: Why aren't BLONDES good cattle herders?
A: Because the can't even more...

181. Q: What do you call a blonde in a tree with a brief case? A: Branch Manager.182. Q: How did the dumb blonde break her leg raking leaves? A: She fell out of the tree.183. Q: How do you get a one-armed blonde out of a tree? A: Wave at her.184. Q: What do you call a smart blond? A: A golden retriever.185. Q: How do you check a blonde's IQ? A: With a tire gauge.186. Q: How does a blonde interpret6.9? A: A 69 interrupted by a period.187. Q: What did the blonde say when she looked into a box of Cheerios? A: "Oh look! Doughnut seeds!"188. Q: Why is it okay for blondes to catch cold? A: They don't have to worry about blowing their brains out.189. Q: Why do blonds have two more brain cells than a cow? A1: So they don't shit everywhere when you pull their tits. A2: So that when you pull their tits, they don't moo.190. Q: Why aren't BLONDES good cattle herders? A: Because the can't even keep two calves together! 191. Q: Why don't blonds breast feed? A: Because they always burn more...

Titicons (.)(.) tiny tits (o) (o) regular tits ( O )( O ) big tits ( @ ) ( @ ) big harry tits (' ) (' ) perky tits {.} {.} shriveled tits (, ) (, ) drippy tits [ _ ] [ _ ] android tits ( # ) ( # ) Tysoned tits

Dave walks into a bar and sees John sitting at the end of the counter with a great big smile on his face.

Dave says "John what are you so happy for?"

"Well Dave, I gotta tell ya... Yesterday I was out waxing my boat, just waxing my boat, and a redhead came up to me... tits out to here, Dave, tits out to here!

She says "Can I have a ride in your boat?" I said' Sure you can have a ride in my boat.' So I took her way out, Dave. I turned off the key and I said' Its either screw or swim!' She couldn't swim, Dave, she couldn't swim!!."

The next day Dave walks into a bar and sees John sitting at the end of the counter with a bigger smile on his face.

Dave says "What are you so happy about today John?"

"Well Dave... I gotta tell ya... Yesterday I was out waxing my boat, just waxing my boat and a BEAUTIFUL blonde came up to me... tits out to here, Dave, tits out to here! She said' Can more...

Who's got long blonde hair and big tits, and lives in Melbourne, Australia? Salman Rushdie.

A little kid goes to a nude beach with his parents. He sees a naked girl and says "Mommy, mommy! That lady has bigger tits than you do!"

So his mom says "The bigger your tits are the dumber you are."

Then the little boy sees a naked guy and says "Mommy, mommy! That man has a bigger dick than daddy!"

So the mom says, "The bigger your dick is the dumber you are."

Then the little boy sees something else. He says, "Mommy, mommy! Daddy is talking to the dumbest lady I ever saw, and he keeps getting dumber and dumber!"