Tourists Jokes / Recent Jokes

BLAMESTORMING - Sitting around in a group discussing why a deadline was missed or a project failed and who was responsible.
PRAIRIE DOGGING - When someone yells or drops something loudly in a "cube farm" (an office full of cubicles) and everyone's heads pop up over the walls to see what's going on.
TOURISTS - People who take training classes just to get a vacation from their jobs. "We had three serious students in the class; the rest were just tourists."
TREEWARE - Printed computer software/hardware documentation.
CLM (Career Limiting Move) - Used among microserfs to describe ill-advised activity. Trashing your boss while he or she is within earshot is a serious CLM. (Also known as CEB - Career Ending Behavior)
OHNOSECOND - That minuscule fraction of time in which you realize that you've just made a BIG mistake. (See CLM)
ADMINISPHERE - The rarefied organizational layers beginning just above the rank and file. Decisions that fall from the more...

BLAMESTORMING - Sitting around in a group discussing why a deadline was missed or a project failed and who was responsible.PRAIRIE DOGGING - When someone yells or drops something loudly in a "cube farm" (an office full of cubicles) and everyone's heads pop up over the walls to see what's going on.TOURISTS - People who take training classes just to get a vacation from their jobs. "We had three serious students in the class; the rest were just tourists."TREEWARE - Printed computer software/hardware documentation.CLM (Career Limiting Move) - Used among microserfs to describe ill-advised activity. Trashing your boss while he or she is within earshot is a serious CLM. (Also known as CEB - Career Ending Behavior)OHNOSECOND - That minuscule fraction of time in which you realize that you've just made a BIG mistake. (See CLM)ADMINISPHERE - The rarefied organizational layers beginning just above the rank and file. Decisions that fall from the admini-sphere are often more...

There was a tour bus in Egypt that stopped in the middle of a town square. The tourists are all shopping at the little stands surrounding the square. One tourist looks at his watch, but it is broken, so he leans over to a local who is squatted down next to his camel. "What time is it, sir?" The local reaches out and softly cups the camel's genitals in his hand, and raises them up and down. "It's about 2:00", he says. The tourist can't believe what he just saw. He runs back to the bus, and sure enough, it is 2:00. He tells a few of the fellow tourists his story, "The man can tell the time by the weight of the camel's genitals!" One of the doubting tourists walks back to the local and asks him the time, the same thing happens! It is 2:05.p.m. He runs back to tell the story. Finally, the bus driver wants to know how it is done. He walks over and asks the local how he knows the time from the camel's genitals. The local says "Sit down here and grab the more...

It is a recorded fact that 25% of all single British female tourists
visiting Spain will have sex with a local man within the first 48 hours in
the country.
Does anyone know who he is?

Three tourists were driving through Wales. As they were approaching Llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobwllllantysiliogogogoch, they started arguing about the pronunciation of the town`s name. They argued back and forth until they stopped for lunch. As they stood at the counter one asked the blonde employee, "Before we order, could you please settle an argument for us? Would you please pronounce where we are... very slowly?" The girl leaned over the counter and said, "Burrrrrr, gerrrrrr, Kiiiiiing."

A group of tourists are touring the Wild West and they see a redneck with his ear to the ground.
"
What are you doing?"
they ask curiously.
"
Two cowboys are one a wagon, heading east. There is only one horse pulling the wagon, a black horse with white legs. The cowboys have brown hats on, and one is wearing a red shirt and one is wearing a blue shirt. Their faces and arms are sunburnt, and they have a cracked wheel, rear left."
"
Wow!"
admire the tourists. "
You can tell all that by putting your ear on the ground?"
"
No,"
replied the redneck. "
They just ran over me!"

As US tourists in Israel, a man and his wife were sitting outside a Bethlehem souvenir shop, waiting for fellow tourists. An Arab salesman approached them carrying belts.
After an impassioned sales talk yielded no results, he asked where they were from.
"America," the husband replied.
Looking at her dark hair and olive skin, the Arab responded. "She's not from the States."
"Yes I am." said the wife.
He looked at her and asked, "Is he your husband?"
"Yes." she replied.
Turning to the husband, he offered... "I'll give you 100 camels for her." The husband looked stunned, and there was a long silence. Finally he replied, "she's not for sale."
After the salesman left, the somewhat indignant wife asked her husband what took him so long to answer, to which the husband replied, "I was trying to figure out how to get 100 camels back home."