Trail Jokes / Recent Jokes

Once upon a time, long, long ago there were two unique lions in the jungles of Africa. Both, it seems, had human-like qualities that made them claim territory, daring the other to cross over the line. Strange as it seems, the boundary between their turf was a well traveled trail through the jungle.All day every day, both lions lay in the brush staring across the trail at their compatriot, daring him to cross into their territory.The local natives knew of this animal feud, but all this was unbeknown to African Jack, a well-known and must publicized guide who did not speak Lionese and was unfamiliar with the territory.While he was leading a safari through the jungle, walking all day and cutting vines with their machetes, all this constant hacking brush had them worn to a frazzle. After seeing two or three of his safari drop from exhaustion, African Jack decided to stop on the trail between these two lions and camp for the night.After sitting up camp, eating, and getting his safari more...

Old Indian Trick
A Cowboy riding down the trail encounters an Indian laying on the trail with hard on. The Cowboy
asks "what are you doing?" Indian says" Me tellum time." Cowboy shakes his head, rides on,
encounters another exactly the same. Says "You telling time?" yup" "how can you tell time like that?"
Indian says "workum like sundial, readum shadow". Cowboy, incredulous, rides on. Encounters
Indian in trail masturbating. Cowboy says "let me guess, you're telling time too." Indian says " Nope.
But me windum clock!"
Indian Visits Whore House
An indian walks into a whore house and throws a bag of money on the counter and says, "me
want pussy."
The woman working the counter decides that she wants to have a little fun with him, and tells him
that he must first fuck the big oak tree on the hill.
The indian replies, "me no want tree, me more...

A pastor in Maine skipped services one Sunday to go bear hunting.Along the trail he turned a corner and collided with a bear. thepastor stumbled, backwards, slipped off the trail, and begantumbling down the mountain, the bear in hot pursuit. Finally thepastor crashed into a bolder, breaking both his legs and sendinghis rifle flying through the air, just out of his reach. As the bear closed in, the pastor cried out "Lord, I'm sorry forwhat I have done. Please forgive me and save me! - Lord pleasemake this bear a Christian". Suddenly the bear skipped to a halt at the pastor's feet, fellto it's knees, clasped it's paws together, began to weep andsaid "God bless this food which I am about to receive!"

clever creatures
A visitor to Glacier National Park in Montana lost his car keys while attempting to lure a ground
squirrel by dangling the keys out in front of the critter. The squirrel grabbed the keys and ran down
a hole with them. The keys were never retrieved, a ranger cited the man for harassment of wildlife,
and a locksmith was called to make new car keys.
putting our loved ones at risk for a photo
In May of 1994, Tony Moore, 43, of Marietta, Georgia, was gored and seriously injured by a large male
bison in Yellowstone, next to the Lake Hotel. Moore and a friend had approached to within 15 feet of
the bison to have their pictures taken. While they were standing with their backs to the animal, it
charged. Moore's companion escaped, but Moore received a severe puncture wound in his right thigh and
was taken by ambulance to a hospital in Jackson for treatment.
watching for falling rocks
A visitor setting up camp at Lake more...