Transfer Jokes

A couple went to the hospital to have their baby delivered. Upon their arrival,
the doctor said he had invented a new machine that would transfer, by kinetic
energy, a portion of the mother's labor pain to the father.
He asked if they were willing to try it out. They were both very much in favor
of it. The doctor initially set the pain-transfer level to 10 percent, saying
that was probably more pain than the father had ever experienced before. But as
the labor progressed, the husband felt fine and asked the doctor to go ahead
and kick it up a notch. The doctor then adjusted the machine to 20 percent pain
transfer. The husband was still feeling fine.
The doctor checked the husband's blood pressure and was amazed at how well he
was doing. At this point they decided to try for 50 percent. The husband
continued to feel quite well. Since the pain transfer was obviously helping out
the wife considerably, the husband encouraged the doctor to more...

On the first day of Christmas, technology gave to me: A database with a broken b-tree
(what the hell is a b-tree anyway?)
On the second day of Christmas, technology gave to me: Two transceiver failures
(CRC errors? Collisions? What is going on?) And a database with a broken b-tree
(Rebuild WHAT? It's a 10GB database!)
On the third day of Christmas, technology gave to me: Three French users
(who, of course, think they know everything) Two transceiver failures
(which are now spewing packets all over the net) And a database with a broken b-tree
(Backup? What backup?)
On the fourth day of Christmas, technology gave to me: Four calls for support
(playing the same Christmas song over and over) Three French users
(Why do they like to argue so much over trival things?) Two transceiver failures
(How the hell do I know which ones they are?) And a database with a broken b-tree
(Pointer error? What a pointer error?)
On the more...

Dear Bank Manager,
I am writing to thank you for bouncing the check with which I endeavored to pay my plumber last month. By my calculations some three nanoseconds must have elapsed between his presenting the check, and the arrival in my account of the funds needed to honor it. I refer, of course, to the automatic monthly deposit of my entire salary, an arrangement which, I admit, has only been in place for eight years.
You are to be commended for seizing that brief window of opportunity, and also for debiting my account with $50 by way of penalty for the inconvenience I caused to your bank. My thankfulness springs from the manner in which this incident has caused me to re-think my errant financial ways. You have set me on the path of fiscal righteousness.
No more will our relationship be blighted by these unpleasant incidents, for I am restructuring my affairs in the second half of 1999, taking as my model the procedures, attitudes and conduct of your very bank. I can more...

Santa once wanted to transfer some files form one PC to another. Following was the steps followed by him.
1) Right clicked the mouse on the file which he wanted to transfer and selected CUT option.
2) Disconnected the mouse from that PC.
3) Took that mouse carefully and connected it to the other PC where he wanted to copy that file.
4) Right clicked the mouse and selected the PASTE option.

there was this happly married couple and they were about to have a baby and they were in the dilvery room ready to have the baby when the doctor came in and asked the couple would like to try this new pain transfer that transfer some of the pain to the dad and the couple were happy to try it so the doctor hooks the dad up to the machine and turns it on to 10% and 5 min later the mom is haveing more contactions and the dad told the doctor that he wasn't feeling any pain at all so why don't you turn the machine up so the doctor turned it up to 20% and 5 min later the dad still didn't feel any pain so he told the doctor why don't you transfer all the pain she is feeling over to me so the doctor did and the mom gave birth to a healthy baby boy with no pain so after they go home with there new baby and they find the mail man dead on the porch.