Truth Jokes / Recent Jokes

At school, a boy is told by a classmate that most adults are hiding at least one dark secret, and that this makes it very easy to blackmail them by saying, "I know the whole truth" even when you don't know anything. The boy decides to go home and try it out. As he is greeted by his mother at the front door he says, "I know the whole truth." His mother quickly hands him $20 and says, "Just don't tell your father." Quite pleased, the boy waits for his father to get home from work, and greets him with, "I know the whole truth." The father promptly hands him $40 and says, "Please don't say a word to your mother." Very pleased, the boy is on his way to school the next day, when he sees the mailman at his front door. The boy greets him by saying, "I know the whole truth."The mailman drops the mail, opens his arms and says, "Then come give your FATHER a big hug!"

One of the nation's largest soup manufacturers announced today that they will be stocking America's shelves this week with their newest Soup creation, "Clinton Soup", that will honor one of the nation's most distinguished men. It consists primarily of a small weenie in hot water! Chrysler Corporation is adding a new car to its line to honor Bill Clinton. The Dodge Drafter will begin production in Canada this year. When Clinton was asked what he thought about foreign affairs, he replied: "I don't know, I never had one." If you came across Bill Clinton struggling in a raging river and you had a choice between rescuing him or getting a Pulitzer Prize-winning photograph, what shutter speed would you use? Chelsea asked her dad, "Do all fairy tales begin with once upon a time?" Bill Clinton replied, "No, some begin with' After I'm elected'." Clinton's mother prayed fervently that Bill would grow up and be president. So far, half of her prayer has been more...

At school, a boy is told by a classmate that most adults are hiding at least one dark secret, and that this makes it very easy to blackmail them by saying, "I know the whole truth" - even when you don't know anything. The boy decides to go home and try it out. As he is greeted by his mother at the front door he says, "I know the whole truth." His mother quickly hands him $20 and says, "Just don't tell your father." Quite pleased, the boy waits for his father to get home from work, and greets him with, "I know the whole truth." The father promptly hands him $40 and says, "Please don't say a word to your mother." Very pleased, the boy is on his way to school the next day, when he sees the mailman at his front door. The boy greets him by saying, "I know the whole truth." The mailman drops the mail, opens his arms and says, "Then come give your FATHER a big hug."
I Know the Whole Truth "At school, a boy was more...

I respect the truth too much to drag it out on every occasion.

'You seem to be in some distress,' said the kindly judge to the witness. 'Is anything the matter?''Well, your Honour,' said the witness, 'I swore to tell the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth, but every time I try, some lawyer objects.'

Universal truth: No one knows the origins of their metal coat hangers.

A new list of the "World's Shortest Books":
STAYING HAPPILY MARRIED
-by Elizabeth Taylor
BEAUTY SECRETS
-by Janet Reno
HOME BUILT AIRPLANES
-by John Denver
DOWN HILL SKIING
-by Sonny Bono
HOW TO GET TO THE SUPER BOWL
-by Dan Marino
FLYING AT NIGHT
-by JFK, Jr.
THINGS I LOVE ABOUT BILL
-by Hillary Clinton
MY LIFE'S MEMORIES
-by Ronald Reagan
THINGS I CAN'T AFFORD-
by Bill Gates
MY PLAN TO FIND THE REAL KILLERS
-by O. J. Simpson
THINGS I WOULD NOT DO FOR MONEY
-by Dennis Rodman
THE TRUTH, THE WHOLE TRUTH, AND NOTHING BUT THE TRUTH
-by the Ramseys
AMELIA EARHART'S GUIDE TO THE PACIFIC OCEAN
AMERICA'S MOST POPULAR LAWYERS
DETROIT - A TRAVEL GUIDE
DR. KEVORKIAN'S COLLECTION OF MOTIVATIONAL SPEECHES
MIKE TYSON'S GUIDE TO DATING ETIQUETTE
THE AMISH PHONE DIRECTORY
HELLEN KELLER'S BIRDWATCHING GUIDE