Unexpectedly Jokes / Recent Jokes
The morning after a senior judge passed away unexpectedly, the court house receptionist answered the phone. "Is Madame Justice Smith there?" the caller asked. "I'm very sorry, but Justice Smith passed away last night," the receptionist answered.
"Is Madam Justice Smith there?" repeated the caller.
The receptionist was perplexed. "Perhaps you didn't understand me I'm afraid Justice Smith passed away last night."
"Is Madam Justice Smith there?" asked the caller again.
"Madam, do you understand what I'm saying?" said the exasperated receptionist. "Justice Smith is dead."
"I understand you perfectly," the caller sighed. "I just can't hear it often enough."
A bored housewife in suburbia is entertaining her lover in bed one day as, unknown to them, her nine-year-old son is taking it all in from her bedroom closet. As luck would have it, the husband arrives home unexpectedly from the office and the surprised wife shoves her lover into the closet.
Son says to lover, "Sure is dark in here, isn't it?"
After jumping out of his skin and crawling back in, the lover replied that it was.
"Would you like to buy a flashlight?" asks the boy. The lover said he didn't think so.
"Sure would be bad if dad found out about this," observed the boy. The lover enquired as to how much the boy wanted for the flashlight and agreed to pay the $25.00 price.
Two weeks later, same housewife, same lover, same boy in the closet when husband again arrives home unexpectedly. Wife shoves lover into closet and son says, "Sure is dark in here, isn't it? Would you like to buy a fishing rod?"
The lover agrees to more...
A wife comes home unexpectedly one day and finds her husband in bed with a lady midget. Upset and furious over his actions, the woman screams, "You promised me two weeks ago that you would never cheat on me again!" Tryinghis best to calm her down, the husband turns to his wife and says, "Take it easy Dear, Can't you see I'm trying to taper off?"
Unexpectedly, the first to score in the Super Bowl was Bill Clinton.
A woman is having an affair during the day while her husband is at work. Her nine-year-old son comes home unexpectedly,
sees the illegal lovers and hides in the bedroom cupboard to watch. Then the woman's husband unexpectedly comes home.
She hides her lover in the cupboard, not realizing that her little boy is in there already. The little Boy says: "Dark in here."
The Man says: "Yes, it is."
Boy: "I have a soccer ball, do you want to buy it?"
Man: "No, thanks."
Boy: "My dad's outside, I'll call him if you don't buy it!"
Man: "OK, how much?"
Boy: "$1, 000."
A few weeks later it happened again,
and the boy and the lover were in the cupboard together again.
Boy: "Dark in here."
Man: "Yes, it is."
Boy: "I have soccer boots."
The Man, remembering the last time, asks the boy: "How much?"
The Boy says: more...