Version Jokes / Recent Jokes
The story of someone getting a haircut. Women's version: Woman2: Oh! You got a haircut! That's so cute! Woman1: Do you think so? I wasn't sure when she gave me the mirror. I mean, you don't think it's too fluffy looking? Woman2: Oh God no! No, it's perfect. I'd love to get my hair cut like that, but I think my face is too wide. I'm pretty much stuck with this stuff I think. Woman1: Are you serious? I think your face is adorable. And you could easily get one of those layer cuts - that would look so cute I think. I was actually going to do that except that I was afraid it would accent my long neck. Woman2: Oh - that's funny! I would love to have your neck! Anything to take attention away from this two-by-four I have for a shoulder line. Woman1: Are you kidding? I know girls that would love to have your shoulders. Everything drapes so well on you. I mean, look at my arms - see how short they are? If I had your shoulders I could get clothes to fit me so much easier. Men's version: Man2: more...
Ebonics Version of Windows '98 Debuts!
Microsoft has announced that its special Ebonics version of Windows 98, titled "It be a fresh Window." It has been leaked to several suburbs, causing confusion for unsuspecting users.
There are numerous differences between Windows 98 and the Ebonics version.
When opening the Ebonics version, the familiar windows chime is replaced With a "phat getto track that melts 'em down wit dope-ass bass," The opening screen features a Windows logo that is spray painted on a brick wall - along with several gangsta signs, slogans and shout outs.
On the main screen, My Computer is replaced with "Dis My Shit."
The Recycle Bin has been replaced with a Goodwill dumpster.
If users are logged on to a network, the Network Neighborhood is replaced With "Da Hood."
Users have their choice of two animated screen savers: "Marquee," a lil' G spray- painting dirty words that move across the more...
If your only contact with three spirits on Christmas Eve is gin, vodka and bourbon.
If your best Christmas tradition involves fire and reindeer meat.
If your idea of Christmas dinner is a six pack of beer and a cheese log.
If your favorite version of "Babes in Toyland" stars Michael Jackson.
If you turn on the lawn sprinklers on Christmas Eve to keep carolers away.
If you get your Christmas tree from an empty lot, at night... the day after Christmas.
You might be a Scrooge, if your favourite version of "Silent Night" is sung by O.J. Simpson.
(Forwarded by an American friend of Italian descent).
It has come to our attention that a few copies of the Brooklyn version of Windows 98 may have accidentally been shipped outside New York. If you have one of the Brooklyn editions you may need some help understanding the commands.
The Brooklyn edition may be recognized by looking at the opening screen.
It reads WINDAS 98 with a background picture of the East River with a floating body. It is shipped with a 'NYPD BLUE' screensaver.
Also note the Recycle Bin is labeled 'Garbitch'
My Computer is called 'My Freakin Computer,'
Dialup Networking is called 'Good Fellas',
Control Panel is known as the 'da Tote Board,'
Hard Drive is referred to as 'da trunk', and...
Floppies are them 'little Freakin plastic disc tings'.
Instead of an error message you get a winda covered with steel bars and Grafitti.
OTHER FEATURES:
WINDOWS 98WINDAS 98
OKdo it I tell ya
Cancelhell more...
Women's version:
Woman2: Oh! You got a haircut! That's so cute!
Woman1: Do you think so? I wasn't sure when she was gave me the mirror. I mean, you don't think it's too fluffy looking?
Woman2: Oh God no! No, it's perfect. I'd love to get my hair cut like that, but I think my face is too wide. I'm pretty much stuck with this stuff I think.
Woman1: Are you serious? I think your face is adorable. And you could easily get one of those layer cuts - that would look so cute I think. I was actually going to do that except that I was afraid it would accent my long neck.
Woman2: Oh - that's funny! I would love to have your neck! Anything to take attention away from this two-by-four I have for a shoulder line.
Woman1: Are you kidding? I know girls that would love to have your shoulders. Everything drapes so well on you. I mean, look at my arms - see how short they are? If I had your shoulders I could get clothes to fit me so much easier.
Men's version:
Man1: more...
I'm currently running the latest version of GirlFriend and I've been having some problems lately. I've been running the same version of DrinkingBuddies 1. 0 forever as my primary application, and all the GirlFriend releases I've tried have always conflicted with it. I hear that DrinkingBuddies won't crash if GirlFriend is run in background mode and the sound is turned off. But I'm embarrassed to say I can't find the switch to turn the sound off. I just run them separately, and it works okay. Girlfriend also seems to have a problem co-existing with my Golf program, often trying to abort Golf with some sort of timing incompatibility.
I probably should have stayed with GirlFriend 1. 0, but I thought I might see better performance from GirlFriend 2. 0. After months of conflicts and other problems, I consulted a friend who has had experience with GirlFriend 2. 0. He said I probably didn't have enough cache to run GirlFriend 2. 0, and eventually it would require a Token Ring to run more...
The story of someone getting a haircut.
Women's version:
Woman2: Oh! You got a haircut! That's so cute!
Woman1: Do you think so? I wasn't sure when she gave me the mirror. I mean, you don't think it's too fluffy looking?
Woman2: Oh God no! No, it's perfect. I'd love to get my hair cut like that, but I think my face is too wide. I'm pretty much stuck with this stuff I think.
Woman1: Are you serious? I think your face is adorable. And you could easily get one of those layer cuts - that would look so cute I think. I was actually going to do that except that I was afraid it would accent my long neck.
Woman2: Oh - that's funny! I would love to have your neck! Anything to take attention away from this two-by-four I have for a shoulder line.
Woman1: Are you kidding? I know girls that would love to have your shoulders. Everything drapes so well on you. I mean, look at my arms - see how short they are? If I had your shoulders I could get clothes to fit me so more...