Village Jokes / Recent Jokes

It may take a village to raise a child. But it only takes one condom to save them the hassle.

A missionary gets sent into deepest darkest Africa and goes to live with a tribe therein. He spends years with the people, teaching them to read, write and the good Christian ways of the white man. One thing he particularly stresses is the evils of sexual sin. Thou must not commit adultery or fornication!

One day the wife of one of the Tribe's noblemen gives birth to a white child. The village is shocked and the chief is sent by his people to talk with the missionary.

'You have taught us of the evils of sexual sin, yet here a black woman gives birth to a white child. You are the only white man that has ever set foot in our village. It doesn't take a genius to work out what has been going on!'

The missionary replies:' No, no, my good man. You are mistaken. What you have here is a natural occurrence -- what is called an albino. Look to thy yonder field. See a field of white sheep, and yet amongst them is one black one. Nature does this on more...

American businessman was at a pier in a small coastalMexican village when a small boat with just one fisherman docked. Inside the small boat were several large yellow-fintuna. The American complimented the Mexican on the quality ofhis fish and asked how long it took to catch them. The Mexican replied only a little while. The American then asked why didnt he stay out longer andcatch more fish? The Mexican said he had enough to support his familysimmediate needs. The American then asked the Mexican how he spent the rest ofhis time. The Mexican fisherman said, "I sleep late, fish a little, play with my children, take siesta with my wife, Maria, stroll into the village each evening where I sip wine andplay guitar with my amigos. I have a full and busy life, senor." The American scoffed, "I am a Harvard MBA and could helpyou. You should spend more time fis hing and, with the proceeds, buy a bigger boat. With the proceeds from thebigger boat, you could buy several boats, more...

The following is supposedly a true story. To be included, besides being true, the story is most likely strange, weird, surprising, or funny.February 1, 1993The Associated Press reported that the village of Sodom, Conn., disappeared, like its biblical namesake.Though it appears on maps, the AP writer interviewed residents of Sodom Road and the Sodom Corner intersection, both hallmarks of the village of Sodom, and discovered that everyone claims now to live in North Canaan

A secret agent was sent to Ireland to pick up some very sensitive information from an agent called Murphy. His instructions were to walk around town using a code phrase until he met his fellow agent. He found himself on a desolate country road and finally ran into a farmer.

"Hello, said the agent, "I'm looking for a man called Murphy."

"Well you're in luck," said the farmer, "as it happens, there's a village right over the hill, where there's a butcher called Murphy, the baker is named Murphy, three widows are called Murphy. In fact my name is Murphy."

"Aha," thought the agent, "here's my man." So he whispered the secret code. "The sun is shining...the grass is growing...the cows are ready for milking."

"Oh," said the farmer, "you're looking for Murphy the spy - he's in the village over the other direction."

The American investment banker was at the pier of a small coastal Mexican village when a small boat with just one fisherman docked. Inside the small boat were several large yellow fin tuna. The American complimented the Mexican on the quality of his fish and asked how long it took to catch them.
The Mexican replied, "Only a little while."
The American then asked, "Why didn't you stay out longer and catch more fish?"
The Mexican said, "With this I have more than enough to support my family's needs."
The American then asked, "But what do you do with the rest of your time?"
The Mexican fisherman said, "I sleep late, fish a little, play with my children, take siesta with my wife, Maria, stroll into the village each evening where I sip wine and play guitar with my amigos, I have a full and busy life."
The American scoffed, "I am a Harvard MBA and could help you. You should spend more time fishing; and with more...

A missionary visited a small village in a remote jungle and began preaching the gospel.
"Jesus saves!" exclaimed the missionary. "Bawana!" shouted the natives.
"Ye must be baptized!" exclaimed the missionary. "Bawana!" shouted the natives
"Donate tithes and offerings!" exclaimed the missionary. "Bawana!" shouted the natives.
Having had such a successful time, the missionalry inquired of the chief as to how he could go to the next village, to share the gospel with them too.
The chief replied, "You go down road one thousand paces, you turn right, climb over wall made of rocks, run across field. Many bulls in field, you run fast, but be careful not step in bawana."