Village Jokes / Recent Jokes

A boat docked in a tiny Mexican village. An American tourist complimented the Mexican fisherman on the quality of his fish and asked how long it took him to catch them. "Not very long," answered the Mexican. "But then, why didn't you stay out longer and catch more?" asked the tourist. The Mexican explained that his small catch was sufficient to meet his needs and those of his family. The tourist asked, "So what do you do with the rest of your time?" "I sleep late, fish a little, play with my children, spend time with my wife... In the evenings I go into the village to see my friends, have a few drinks, play the guitar, chase the senioras, and sing a few songs. I have a full life." The tourist said, "I have a M.B.A. from Stanford and I can help you. You should start by fishing longer every day. You can then sell the extra fish you catch. With the extra revenue, you can buy a bigger boat. With the extra money the larger boat will bring, you more...

There are many tales of W. G. Grace, a Intellectual personality not averse to bending the rules to suit his own ends.

On one occasion, he was guest player against a village team. Their fast bowler charged up and with his first ball uprooted Grace's middle stump. Grace ixed a piercing eye on him.

'A very good trial ball,' he said.' And now let us begin.'

A young missionary had just taken up a new post in a remote Maori village. The young man was the first white man to set foot in the area in quite some time.
Upon entering the village he was quite distressed at the liberal attitude towards sexual practices and began to preach chastity to his new flock with a vengence.
10 months later the daughter of the chief gives birth to a white baby. As the missionary is the only white man around the chief furiously confronts him.
"You preach chastity to me and all the time you are doing the devils work with my daughter. I'm going to kill you, you hypocrite."
"No it wasn't me" stammered the missionary "It's just a freak of nature."
"Oh sure! A black woman gives birth to a white baby and you're the only white man for miles and you call it a freak of nature. Now I'm going to kill you slowly."
"No, it's true" responded the missionary. "It's called an albino. These sort of more...

An American investment banker was at the pier of a small coastal Mexican village when a small boat with just one fisherman docked. Inside the small boat were several large yellow fin tuna. The American complimented the Mexican on the quality of his fish and asked how long it took to catch them. The Mexican replied, "Only a little while." The American then asked, "Why didn't you stay out longer and catch more fish?" The Mexican said, "With this I have more than enough to support my family's needs." The American then asked, "But what do you do with the rest of your time?" The Mexican fisherman said, "I sleep late, fish a little, play with my children, take siesta with my wife, Maria, stroll into the village each evening where I sip wine and play guitar with my amigos, I have a full and busy life."
The American scoffed, "I am a Harvard MBA and could help you. You should spend more time fishing; and with the proceeds, buy a more...

Once upon a time, three vampires met in some place in night. Apparently, each one of them was boasting about their vampiric abilities to one another.
Vampire A said, "Look at that mansion over there! I can finish all of its inhabitants within 10 minutes!"
And so he flew to the mansion, and 9 minutes later, he came back with his mouth filled with blood, looking satisfied with himself.
Vampire B then said, "Bah! Look at that village over there! Give me 5 minutes!"
He flew to the village, returned at the next 5 minutes, with his mouth filled with dripping red blood.
Vampire C then yelled, "Pffft! Look at the TOWN over there! Give me 3 minutes!"
He flew to the direction of the town, and one minute later, he returned with his mouth filled with blood.
Vampire A and B stared at him with amazement, then immediately asked, "How come you have such speed, friend?"
Vampire C pointed at a direction, then asked them, "Do more...

Many years ago in a small Indian village, A farmer had the misfortune Of owing a large sum of money to a village moneylender. The Moneylender, who was old and ugly, fancied the farmer's beautiful Daughter. So he proposed a bargain.
He said he would forgo the farmer's debt if he could marry his Daughter. Both the farmer and his daughter were horrified by the Proposal.
So the cunning money-lender suggested that they let Providence decide the matter.
He told them that he would put a black Pebble and a white pebble into an empty money bag. Then the girl would Have to pick one pebble from the bag.
1) If she picked the black pebble, she would become his wife and her father's debt would be forgiven.
2) If she picked the white pebble she need not marry him and her father's debt would still be forgiven.
3) But if she refused to pick a pebble, her father would be thrown into Jail.
They were standing on a pebble strewn path in the farmer's field. As They more...

There was once a villager who got engaged to a girl from the neighboring village. One day he decided to walk there and visit his fiance. So he asked his mum to go and buy some material to make him some new underwear since he had been wearing his for 3 months. His mum bought 5 meters and made two pairs for him with 2 meters leaving 3 meters spare. He put on his new underwear and his best kilt (skirt) and set off for the next village. When he was half way there, he needed to go to the toilet, and took off his underwear, and hung it on a tree so as not to dirty it. When he was done, he forgot to put his underwear back on. When he got to his fiances house, he sat opposite her so as to show off his new underwear. The girl looked shocked. When the man saw her expression, he thought she was impressed with his new underwear, and said, "Do u like it? I have another 3 meters at home."